I Wish... You Were A Frog

Granted, but you're 2'1" and nobody takes you seriously.

I wish I had a Brand new, very large, plasma TV.

Granted, but you'd end up in jail accused of stealing it.

I wish I had a wishing well in my name.

Granted, but it gives out curses rather then wishes.

I wish I didn't need to wear glasses.

Granted. You're blind.

I wish I had Atla Shrugged by Ayn Rand.

granted, but you never read Fountainhead.

i wish i had a computer that undertood shorthand.

Granted, but as a result,your computer ceases to understand binary, and permanently stops working.

I wish that Beldaran and carrot red were the same person, so that they couldn't double post.

Granted, but in the process of granting your wish, the wishing machine gets jammed and you and Monica become the same person instead.

I wish people would say what they mean without resorting to jokes to express themselves.

Granted, but because everyone cant use expressive jokes, they resort to interpretive dance instead.

I wish that The Silent Assassin would start posting again.

Granted, but he only posts crap.

(btw, we almost beat Varina in football yesterday)

I wish I was tanner.

Granted, because your now a tanner because I wanted you to be one.

I wish I wasn't so sad all the time.

Granted. You aren't sad. You're freakin' depressed.

I wish... ...i knew what to wish for.

Granted, but now you have no mouth nor fingers, so you cant wish for it.

I wish I could finish making a ZC quest.

Granted. It sucks.

I wish people stopped trying to get me to play Zelda Classic.

Granted. Instead, they pester you to make quests.

I wish college was free.

Granted, but Beer now costs ten times as much.

I wish I knew what to say next.

Granted, but I decapitate you mercilessly. Let's see you say something now.

I wish I could find a way to quell the fiery rage that is burning within me now.

Granted, but you are overcome with despair.

I wish there was a single button on the keyboard that inserted the bold tags because they are really annoying to type out.

granted, but vowels disappear from the keyboard and become special characters

i wish i owned a very big DVD collection.

Granted, all the dvds suck.

I wish no body ever used caps lock

Granted, but they stop using the space bar too.

I wish I could send raw feelings through the Internet with my mind.

Granted, but you are unable to hide your feelings over the internet. Anyone chatting with you knows exactly what you are feeling.

I wish I was gigantic robot wizard with the power of DOOM FORCE that I could use to bring the nations of earth to their knees in obedience and adoration.

Granted, but the nations of the world go willingly into exile to show their revolt and protest and you only find the mirror to adore and obey you.

I wish I had a dragon pet.

Granted. He eats you.

I wish there was a TV remote so big that you could use it as a bridge between the earth and the moon. If you pressed the "power" button, the sun would turn on and off. I have no idea why I wish for this, but I do.

Granted, but you'd be on the dark side of the moon and won't be able to enjoy the special effects.

I wish I could sleep 8 hours a night like most people.

Granted, but then most people start sleeping about 4 hours a day and everyone thinks you're really lazy.

I wish GTA: Liberty City Stories was coming to the PC, 'cause I don't wanna splash out a fortune for a PSP.

Granted, but you're out of money for a year.

I wish more people were interested in space exploration.

Granted, but they soon lose interest when all nations stop funding space journeys.

I wish less people were interested in space exploration.

granted, but they are no longer interested in games either

i wish the world was less materialist.

Granted. Nobody has any money anymore.

I wish for a pony.

granted, but it will be your own personal car.

i wish i had my own vessel.