Granted. Now you're forgetful ALL the time.
I wish that I could speak every language known to mankind (and a few unknown)
I Wish... You Were A Frog
Granted, but on your way to the press conference to announce your lingual mastery, you get into a car accident and are rendered mute for the rest of your existence.
I wish it weren't so blasted hot in my corner of Michigan right now.
Granted. It's blasted hot everywhere in Michigan.
I wish that life was more like video games (Nintendo in particular).
Granted, but you keep losing lives and seeing the Game Over screen.
I wish I could get more sleep these days. Seriously, it's getting really bad.
Granted. You learn how to hibernate for decades at a time. Unfortunately, you require the succulent nutrition of five human livers to perform this feat. As a result, you're now being chased by a pair of FBI agents, and they're not after you for your peach pie recipie.
I wish my mom weren't paranoid about using the computer during a thunderstorm. Blah. Offline for me.
Granted, but your mom is paranoid about everything else you do. She checks your phone records, searches your room on a daily basis and tails you when you leave the house. Congratulations! Your own stalker. You must be so proud.
I STILL wish it weren't so hot.
Granted. It now feels like 103, but it's really only 98. Or, wait, do you use the celsius scale? Have fun crying boiling tears before you die.
I wish my car had more gas in it.
Granted, but don't get too excited, its only 5 dollars worth.
I wish this game design class wasn't so boring...
Granted, but now it's so cool you fail to learn anything, and promptly flunk the year, the end result being you living out of a trashcan. I'm mean...
I wish I had more Ice Lollies. I've run out...
Granted. You now have an unlimited supply of ice lollines, but as you consume them, you grow fatter and fatter until one day you are but a sad shell of your former self. Your diet is now primarily made up of ice lollies, seasoned curly fries, and fried hippo lard.
I wish I had $250 so I could invest in a business opportunity.
Granted, but the business fails meserably.
I'm not fat, I'm big boned...
I wish my life weren't so dull.
Granted, you get chased by immortal ninjas every day.
I wish we had Doctor Pepper, I could really go for some...
Granted. Doctor Pepper, in a twist of dramatic irony, drugs you and fills your body cavities with salt.
I wish my sister would clean out her rabbit cages more than once every five or six weeks. I'm talking pounds of crap here, people. Three square feet, and an inch thick. Times thirteen.
Granted. Now she scoops out the rabbit turds and fills your shoes with them every morning.
I wish I had my own computer.
Granted! Enjoy your new state-of-the-art Pentium One processor.
I wish I didn't have to clean the house today... 😞
Granted. You have to go clean Michael Jackson's mansion in your undies.
I wish I had more money for beers.
Granted, but I come over and drink them all.
I wish I could get a bit more sleep. I'm shattered... 😞
Granted. You've gotten three nanoseconds more sleep. Feeling refreshed?
I wish I had a hot new wardrobe. (Um, made of indestructible fabrics.)
Granted, but it gets stuck on you and you really need to get it off for whatever reason comes to your mind first but can't because it's indestructible. Example, you try scissors and just plain ripping at it, and anything else you can think up.
I wish I was on armageddon more often than I currently am without it messing up the schedule I still don't have.
Granted, but then the server goes down and we lose everything.
I wish for a dead squirrel lying in the road beside our house that has it's organs stuck on the tire of a truck currently doing 50 down the M1 while the driver is listening to a Meat Loaf album and jacking himself off to a mental picture of Britney Spears dancing naked in the pouring rain outside a nightclub where Christina Aguilera is stripping to the tune of Lady Marmalade and Jessica Simpson is pleasuring herself with a magazine on a nearby table in full view of dozens of reporters all armed with cameras, ready to splash the images all over the internet.
God I'm bored.
Granted. All of that stuff happens, but then you wake up and realize that you're a dirty, dirty pervert. Shame on you.
I wish I had the money to get my car fixed up properly. It doesn't start well in the cold.
Granted, but it gets about 2 miles to the gallon and has no air conditioning.
I'm already a filthy pervert. What's your point?
I wish I had more cold drinks. I'm running low.
Granted. The drinks are so cold your organs are frozen and shatter,
the frozen gut-shards ripping you open and killing you instantly.
I wish I had more money.
Granted, but its in ruples which are coated in anthrax.
I wish Jessica Alba was my roommate.
Granted, but shes a killer!
I wish I could make the best ZC game!
Granted, but your success and fame is posthumous, cuz a lightning bolt hits and kills you.
I wish I had 20/20 vision.
Granted,but you have one eye on the top of your head and it is covered by hair!
I wish I had super-sonic-hearing!
Granted, but you lose your ears all together.
I wish this wish couldn't be granted.
Edit: Ain't I a mother fucker.
Not granted,but it isn't true...so...GRANTED!
...What?...
I wish I was right!
Rulehy wrote:Not granted,but it isn't true...so...GRANTED!
...What?...I wish I was right!
WRONG! I'll tell you what you would do.
The wish isn't granted, but you would make it so everything I DON'T wish to happen... DOES HAPPEN!
Granted: But everything else in your life gos wrong VERY WRONG!
I wish ^ would shoot himself in the head. "note this is the next person to post"