Trapped on an island.

you use it as bait for a sea turtle, which you ride to shore on.

I take a lawn chair! (>_> what's the point of being marooned on a tropical island, if you can't relax?)

You relax and calmly wait for a rescuer. Then it doesn't come, so you make a raft and attach the lawn chair to it, patiently waiting to get rescued.

I take a giant, tame water spider.

I kill the spider with a giant space laser, 'cause hey, giant spiders are nasty. When we send a team to investigate the charred remains, you are rescued.

I take a large red bucket.

You climb inside the bucket and it floats out to sea. It ends up on another island, and you end up joining a community of 10 other people who've got trapped on the other island and have built a thriving village.

I bring Wales.

Well, you can't bring a country, so I guess you just kinda warp to Wales. Or do you mean whales? If that were the case, they carry you over to Wales.

I'll bring a skewer.

It pulls a giant kebab into port and you ride it to Wales.

I bring Scotland.

Their anger for you being English rockets you out of the sky and back to England's green and pleasant land.

I bring the Grim Reaper.

He kills you, and then you respawn in your bedroom.

I bring a turkey. (alive)

You get on its back and it flies away home.

I bring a piece of lint.

It transforms into a giant lint monster. Lucky you! He's tame and he swims you back home.

I bring a roll of wet toilet paper.

Since the toilet paper is the only thing you have to eat, you get real pissed and swim home for a sandwich.

I bring the latest issue of Hustler.

It is a special men edition and you end up puking your guts out. The puke hardens and creates a path to the playboy mansion.

I bring a poptart.

The Pop-Tart overcooks. We all know how dangerous those are, and the flaming power of Pop-Tarts is powerful enough to propel you back to the nearest semi-civilized country.

I bring a moose.

you accidentally piss it off, and it starts chasing you. That's more than enough incentive to swim back to civilization.

I bring a years supply of pizza.

You eat all the pizza in one night and gain 400 pounds, you are so fat you float to civilization.

I bring a bag full of paint.

You paint an SOS on the beach away from the water. Eventually someone rescues you.

I take Mallet-sama (you never know if you need to smash something) :gavel:

you smash up a bunch of stumps and suddenly, the*you solved the puzzle!* zelda music plays, revealing a hidden hovercraft.

I bring Jack Sparrow. My escape is now assured for one very good reason. He's captain Jack sparrow!

A nearby tree falls on him, but you ride the log as a boat to civilization.

I take toe jam.

I use it to glue some logs together, and float away.

I take a bag of corn chips.

A little corn chip fairy comes and poofs you to civilization.

I take mint ice cream.

I use the ice cream to slowly but surely freeze my self a path over the water to land.

I take a blank stack of CDs.

You arrange the CDs into a pattern that when light reflects off it, it somehow magnetically attracts boats to it. Then they see you and you escape.

Man I forgot this topic I started. anyway:
I take a beating heart.

That proceeds to beat you, enough to make you run on the water back to a city

I bring the Master Sword

you stick in in a pedestal there, and go back seven years. now you know what to do to avoid ending up on the island.

I take a good book.

And burn it to cook lobsters I catch

I take the Ocarina of Time (from MM)

You use it to play a tune to warp back to civilization.

I take a bunny rabbit.

And roast it with the book fire

I take the Hook Shot (From OoT, and I will keep bringing Zelda Items FYI)

The hookshot breaks and you walk across ankle deep water to get another one.

I take an angry chihuahua.

And feed it to a fish of some sort to make it fatter for more food

I take the Boomerang from WW