Not really a game, but meh.. Might be funny to read later on if there's a bunch of funny ones.
He has won the lifetime achievement award, twice.
He once warned a psychic.
Once while sailing around the world, he discovered a short cut.
When he drives a new car off the lot, it increases in value.
I don't always make shitty posts, but when I do, it's at AGN.
He lives vicariously through himself.
Even his tree houses have fully finished basements.
He once played a game of "Super Mario Bros" and saved the princess in world 1-1.
He never says something 'tastes like chicken'. Not even chicken.
He doesn't always play a Red Shirt on Star Trek. But when he does, he survives the whole episode.
When he plays Zelda, Ganon simply hands over the Triforce of Power.
When he posts on AGN, his username is ctrl-alt-delete.
He rarely tries too hard, but when he does it's effortless.
Ambulances pull over to let him drive by.
He once had an awkward moment, just to see what it was like.
When the Roswell aliens captured him, he probed them.
I don't always put jokes in my forum profiles, but when I do, my favorite Zelda game is Freshly Picked Tingle's Rosy Rupeeland.
He finished reading the whole internet.
He's the man that walked into the Men's Warehouse and when he walked out somebody else liked the way he looked.
He knows how to get to Sesame Street, he doesn't keep asking.
When life gives him lemons, he makes lemonade and ALSO meringue.
He had a near death experience once, but when death touched him, death died, & he adopted death jr.
He's been where Donkey Kong gets barrels.
When he plays though Mass Effect, the ending he gets is satisfying.
I don't always drink beer, but when I do, it's way better beer than Dos Equis.
He can play Crysis on his 486 on max settings with no lag.
He liberated all of South Africa by accident once while staying at a Holiday Inn Express.
When he does lets play challenge runs, he doesn't use save states.
I don't always drink beer, but when I do, it's obscenely over hopped.