Here's the rest of our misadventure...
<CJC> Resisting the urge to eat the raccoon's TASTY FLESH MEATS, you fling it towards the sound of the FIRE SIREN. You're surprised at the strength of your fling, and somewhat amused when the RACCOON BODY hits the windshield of the FIRE TRUCK and sends the vehicle careening off THE EMBANKMENT.
<CJC> You see: CRASHED FIRE TRUCK, TASTY FLESH MEATS
<Aeos> examine crashed fire truck
<CJC> It looks like the FIREMEN survived the crash, but three of them are injured. The truck is equipped with a WATER RESEVOIR and several FIRE HOSES. It is also bright and flashy.
<Aeos> head towards fire truck
<CJC> You crawl towards the FIRE TRUCK, taking care to keep your DISEMBOWELED ORGANS inside your body. You probably tied your shirt around those glass wounds that were causing you to BLEED PROFUSELY. In short order you arrive at the FIRE TRUCK.
<CJC> FIREMAN: OH MAH GOD IT'S BATH SALTS! RUN!
<CJC> The fireman throws his BLUE RIBBON CHILI at your face.
* Zaphod gives channel half-operator status to Majora
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* Alpha1 gives channel half-operator status to Kefka
<Aeos> Ignore the three firemen you have nicknamed "Moe", "Larry", and "Curly", and head for medical compartment
<CJC> You come to the MEDICAL COMPARTMENT and discover a SUPER FANTASTIC FIRST AID KIT. Wiping the BLUE RIBBON CHILI from your eyes you open up the kit and find a HOME SURGERY ROBOT, ADHESIVE MEDICAL STRIPS, and an EMERGENCY HAM.
<Aeos> Grab the fire axe from the back, use the medical strips, and make a splint from them
<CJC> Using the CHOP-O BRAND FIRE AXE and the ADHESIVE MEDICAL STRIPS, you apply a splint to your BROKEN LEG. You can now move without crawling.
<Aeos> realize you also have gained the power to AXEKICK
<CJC> !!!
<CJC> (Granted!)
<Zelda64GLD> #�*$*$�!*�#!�#�@*
<Aeos> (no amazing description?)
<Aeos> (of this revelation?)
<CJC> (Okay...)
<CJC> As you have strapped a CHOP-O BRAND FIRE AXE to your BROKEN LEG, you realize that the head of the axe is perfectly aligned with your foot to allow for the awesome martial arts technique known as the AXEKICK. You can use the AXEKICK to KILL THINGS and make TASTY FLESH MEAT.
<Aeos> return to surgical robot to repair disembowelment
<Aeos> (no need to intesti-garrote anything anymore)
<CJC> The HOME SURGERY ROBOT whirs to life, and you wonder if you should read the COMPLICATED INSTRUCTION MANUAL that is included before pressing its SHINY BUTTONS.
<Aeos> read portion of manual that is in Carthaginian
<Aeos> CORRECTION: Read portion of manual that is in Punic
<CJC> You flip through the manual until you find the portion that is written in your DEAD LANGUAGE OF CHOICE.
<CJC> It says to press the buttons in the following order to treat DISEMBOWELED ORGANS: GREEN, PUCE, PINK, GREEN, OFF-PURPLE.
<Aeos> play Simon Says with the robot instead
<CJC> XD
<CJC> $roll 1d5
<CJC> (Hold that thought)
<CJC> (Rolls real d6, throws away 6s)
<CJC> The robot, falsly interpreting your instructions, gives you RADICAL COSMETIC SURGERY, managing to repair your DISEMBOWELED ORGANS but also transforming you into a DEEP ONE SERVANT OF THE DARK LORD.
<CJC> You notice the machine is produced by DAGON INCORPORATED
<Aeos> Realize that the only way to return to normal is if you make a pilgrimage to several sites said to have a connection with STENDARR
<Aeos> Also realize that the robot is a enslaved reincarnation of JIMI HENDRIX
<CJC> False, JIMI HENDRIX was always a robot. That's how he was able to use his guitar like a theremin.
<CJC> As you come to the realization that your state as a DEEP ONE SERVANT OF THE DARK LORD can only be cured by a FICTICIOUS VIDEO GAME ENTITY, you begin to wonder if you can pursue that course of recovery without INFRINGING INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY.
<Aeos> Remember that his forgotten transvestite sister STENDAAAAH has the same powers
<CJC> Bonus points for creative abuse of FAIR USE.
<CJC> You begin a pilgrammage to the shrine of STENDAAAH, but... you don't know which way to go. You'll need a BADASS MAP to find your way.
<Aeos> pack and bring the first-aid kit
<Aeos> also, steal Curly's hat and boots. He doesn't need them right now.
<CJC> You are now a DEEP ONE IN FIREMAN ATTIRE with a SUPER FANTASTIC FIRST AID KIT. You set out to find a HARDCORE CARTOGRAPHER to make you a BADASS MAP.
<Aeos> Ask Moe about the nearest cartographer. He appears to only know Farsi.
<CJC> ...
<CJC> (Hold that thought)
<CJC> You speak with MOE THE FIREMAN in ANCIENT PERSIAN, and he stares at you with COMPLETE INCOMPREHENSION.
<CJC> Suddenly, MOE THE FIREMAN has his head spin and vomits PEA SOUP. You suspect talking to anyone in your current state will cause similar results.
<CJC> (I'm running out of material)
<Aeos> combine BLUE RIBBON CHILI and PEA SOUP to make MEDICAL WONDER DRUG
<Aeos> I'm not. XD
<CJC> You craft a MEDICAL WONDER DRUG. Unfortunately, you will not know what the MEDICAL WONDER DRUG does until you perform HUMAN TESTING. You also remember the MYSTERIOUS REMOTE CONTROL in your pocket.
<Aeos> Force Larry to take MEDICAL WONDER DRUG. Unfortuntely, it has to be taken anally.
<CJC> X_X
<CJC> LARRY THE FIREMAN is overpowered by you, the DEEP ONE IN FIREMAN CLOTHES, and forced to take your WONDER SUPPOSITORY. He seems perfectly healthy for a few moments before spontaneously transforming into a DUCK BILLED PLATYPUS.
<Aeos> Stuff DUCK BILLED PLATYPUS into Moe's mouth
<CJC> You see: MOE THE FIREMAN, who is VOMITING PEA SOUP. LARRY THE FIREMAN, who is now LARRY THE PLATYPUS. CURLY THE FIREMAN, who is WRITHING IN FEAR OF BATH SALTS
<CJC> You stuff LARRY THE PLATYPUS into MOE THE FIREMAN 's mouth. The latter chokes to death on the former.
<Aeos> Scalp Moe's AFRO off of him and put it on the MEDICAL ROBOT
<CJC> You have successfully crafted a MOEBOT
<Aeos> Correct narrator and rename MOEBOT as HENDRIXBOT MOE.0
<CJC> 0_o
<CJC> ERROR! HENDRIX and MOE are incompatible. Entering DEATH SLAUGHTER MODE.
 King_Aquamentus has quit (Ping timeout)
<Aeos> use remote to "fix the problem"
<CJC> You point the MYSTERIOUS REMOTE at the MEDICAL ROBOT in DEATH SLAUGHTER MODE and find that it is compatible. Even more interesting, you notice that the MYSTERIOUS REMOTE seems to work on ANYTHING IT POINTS AT. You wish you had discovered this earlier.
<Aeos> (gimme a moment, I'm visualizing this
<Aeos> )
<Aeos> oh yeah
<Aeos> gain the power to TOEBLOCK and TOEDEFLECT with the fire boot
<CJC> (I've got to go away from keyboard for a while. Be back soon)
<Aeos> that's okay
<Aeos> I'm almost done with how the character appears
<Aeos> https://dl.dropbox.com/u/67765234/Photos/whathavewedone.png
<Aeos> there we go
<Aeos> (it's not complete)
<CJC> XD
<CJC> I love that it's 8-bit
<CJC> Anyway...
<CJC> Realizing you have exhausted the crashed FIRE TRUCK, you continue NORTH down the INTERSTATE HIGHWAY. To the WEST, you spot a SMALL CABIN that looks like it's SEEN BETTER DAYS.
<Aeos> Make HENDRIXBOT call the number on the FOR RENT sign
<CJC> (Hmmm)
<CJC> HENDRIXBOT calls the number on the sign, but as he is a robot he can only communicate through BINARY FAX TRANSMISSION. After several confusing minutes, the dialtone signals call's end.
<Aeos> Realize that the phone is in the afro, and use it to call the number instead.
<CJC> EXCELLENT! You dial the number, expecting to rent the SMALL CABIN after you own home turned into a BLAZING INFERNO. However, you forgot that you are a DEEP ONE IN FIREMAN CLOTHES and thus your voice DRIVES PEOPLE MAD. You hear frothing from the other side of the phone.
<Aeos> Knowing that the cabin is now likely in legal limbo, AXEKICK the door.
<Aeos> Then realize that this cabin is VERY old-style and that the door is, in fact, just a skin pelt.
<Aeos> So you enter.
<CJC> You AXEKICK the door and it crumples in the-
<CJC> Dammit, you type too fast!
<CJC> Okay, you enter the prehistoric cabin to find... A MOOSE! (You knew we'd get back there eventually)
<Aeos> Riddle the moose with three questions
<CJC> What do you ask?
<Aeos> What moves with men and air, but not on its own?
<CJC> The moose, being a moose, stares at you and chews on something.
<CJC> *THE MOOSE, **SOMETHING
<Aeos> realize you asked the question in the wrong language, and do it again in the lost Olmec language
<Aeos> with Swahili dialect
<CJC> Extopalopokettle (spelling?), the God of War
<CJC> (Hold that thought, I have to do some research)
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<CJC> You realize that no matter what you say to THE MOOSE, it is still just a MOOSE and thus will not be able to comprehend you. You do notice, however, that what it is chewing is NOT A WALNUT.
 _4matsy ([email protected]) has joined #agn
* Alpha1 gives voice to _4matsy
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* Alpha1 gives voice to Fireblast124
<Fireblast124> $recall
<Aeos> Find a PHONEBOOK
<CJC> You search around THE MOOSE for a PHONEBOOK, and you find one inside a desk. The PHONEBOOK is from 1880.
<Shane> ziiiiiiiiing
<Fireblast124> http://www.reddit.com/r/Minecraft/comments/16rur1/now_you_can_dubstep_in_minecraft/
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<Alpha1> [King_Aquamentus] [23:38] <Captain_B> no wonder he emanates evil <Captain_B> his innards contain rich chocolate Ovaltine
* Alpha1 gives channel operator status to King_Aquamentus
 Zaphod hits the bong
<Aeos> Call ALEXANDER GRAHAM BELL, SAMUEL MORSE and ELISHA GRAY from the grave using the PHONEBOOK
<CJC> "Don't be silly. Edison wouldn't let either of us anywhere near his necrophone"
<CJC> You call ALEXANDER GRAHAM BELL, the inventor of the TELEPHONE, using your SMARTPHONE YOU FORGOT YOU HAD
 Shane has quit (Ping timeout)
<Aeos> tell him (and the other three) to come over
<CJC> You wish that you could invite them to come over, but you have again forgotten you are a DEEP ONE IN FIREMAN CLOTHES and anyone you speak with will be DRIVEN INSANE. Unfortunately for you, since you were using the TELEPHONE as a TIME MACHINE, you have caused the erasure of MASSIVE TRACTS OF HISTORY.
<CJC> Unbeknownst to you, these three were essential in the events that LEAD TO YOUR CREATION, and so you have CEASED TO EXIST. Game over.
<Aeos> d'awww 😞
<Aeos> well at least you can look at my pic
<Aeos> also I planned to do something crazily fitting with those three
<CJC> XD
<CJC> Okay, what were you going to do?
<Aeos> All four of us was going to hold hands and make a circle
<Aeos> and then through dark rites, transform the the moose into a demonic form
<CJC> Demon moose?
<Aeos> The Running Fridge Stuffed with Canned Prince Albert
<Aeos> the demon associated with phone prankery
<CJC> ...
[HR][/HR]
[CENTER]And just because I can... It has now spawned this picture (currently WIP, will dynamically update) and my av:
[HR][/HR]
[/CENTER]
Found this randomly, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLlUeb6S3YE
Someone had a to much fun with the first half life. >.<
Haha, wow.
I think if there's any one video that I would say I almost died laughing at, it would be This one. Oh my yes.
Majora's Mask toilet guy in real life.
--------------------------------------------
That has to suck if its the only store that's close to you.
--------------------------------------------
And I hope this is for golfers <.<
--------------------------------------------
[video=youtube;XekRzr-Qaa8]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=XekRzr-Qaa8[/video]
Link never, ever gives the enemy a break...
<CJC> Yay, finished the second problem. Eight to go
<SUCCESSOR> Self improvement?!
<CJC> No, vector analysis
<SUCCESSOR> LOL
Short but funny.
EDIT: Beware the dangers of 'copy image url'!
<King_Aquamentus> there has never ever ever EVER to my knowledge been a Raccoon theme power or Zord in the Power Rangers or Super Sentai franchises.
<King_Aquamentus> so maybe they do kinda just suck
<CJC> Argh, and here I am halfway through spriting it! Why do turtles have to be so hard to represent in a 16x16 box?!
<CJC> I guess heightened senses is sort of a thing (Lens of Truth?)
<King_Aquamentus> maybe.
<King_Aquamentus> they do have sensitive noses apparently
<CJC> Beware eating mushrooms!
<CJC> Hahaha
<King_Aquamentus> yeah it was weird
<King_Aquamentus> but it sure was fun!!!
<CJC> Talon, go home. You are drunk.
<King_Aquamentus> who is Talon? sounds like some sort of farmer.
<CJC> : P
<CJC> Taron, then
<King_Aquamentus> who is Taron?
<CJC> Cut me some slack, I haven't played the game in over a decade!
<CJC> Tarin
<King_Aquamentus> who is Tarin?
<Chris_Miller> from LA
<CJC> Don't start with me, I googled it and that is correct!
<Chris_Miller> >.>
<King_Aquamentus> who is >.>?
<Chris_Miller> <.<
<Chris_Miller> ^.^
<Chris_Miller> v.v
<CJC> data:image/jpeg;base64,/9j/4AAQSkZJRgABAQAAAQABAAD/2wCEAAkGBwgHBgkIBwgKCgkLDRYPDQwMDRsUFRAWIB0iIiAdHx8kKDQsJCYxJx8fLT0tMTU3Ojo6Iys/RD84QzQ5OjcBCgoKDQwNGg8PGjclHyU3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3N//AABEIAFoAawMBIgACEQEDEQH/xAAcAAACAgMBAQAAAAAAAAAAAAAFBgQHAAIDAQj/xAA2EAACAQMDAQYFAgUEAwAAAAABAgMABBEFITESBhMiQVFhBxRxgZEyoSNCwdHwFVKx8SQzcv/EABoBAQADAQEBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAQCAwUBAAb/xAApEQACAgEEAQMCBwAAAAAAAAABAgADEQQSITFBEyJxB
<CJC> VEUFTKBkcHw/9oADAMBAAIRAxEAPwC8ayvM0N1DW7OwuYreZmM0uyIi5ycgY+u9cJA7klUscKITrK5RSiQAr+MbiuldkZjcVUXb/wCI99baq2n9nZ+lYcpLJ3QYtICQQM+nH1q3GO1Vj2o0TQ9Q7RTTGJfmXHSO7bhgP17cNnH4qjUPtXOZdQm5sRFT4jdrrK6In1Biw5ingTH3GART72Q+K9rqc8dprcC2c77LMrfw2PuDuv7ioOp6JbXjdxHMlo0niZoo17yRt9ySOPakXthoNxp/dXki2ypJGisIxjLgeLbzzzRUv5inoUifR8E8U69UEiyKCR1KcjI5FdaqL4MdoraG3u9KvJpO+LmeNn8QIIAO/rtVrrcwkArLGQeD1DemrYCO4J0KnE71lahs1tVkhMryvayvT00Y4GScVTWr6nHPqmqLdrcXV0ZSLAwuf4W+R
<CJC> +DiriuY++gkizjrUrkeWRVajspP2dInM8JUzs3V4mdhjYb/AF96JqwxTI8TR+n3JUWJ5PiR9J1PtDZKEEsclzJOnUsrMZGBx4N9uDmrVXiq4tZ1g1iG6dWF4UKkFgcgE52zsSPPnYVYlvKk0KyRnKsMg1HQ2+pWM8HyJVrGLtuIA+IpfEnXV0PTI2fqKyll6FOOs42H05J+lLlprWjvpiTrdwJCsYYqzAFTjjHrWvxlTVLz5S1SwV7US9cdzG+Wz04KlfLnOeDtSZd9jb+HRukQrJedXfZjGTjB6kz7bH3qGoAd+5bpR7Oo8aRrGn6y0jWM/WyYZkZOkr5Z35+tKPbrUF1PVIdGgQrJDKOqRztuMk49MUA7H6sNF1gvPDI6yKY2RB487EbfUVYUdgbqb5+W1it5pj42Zct7LtudscbbUK+xKMExA57kTsNoD6ZLfSTOr
<CJC> 5KojouMjGSd9xyPxR64uHc3MGlQKzwx95I5XwqPc7Dy8zUSa5t7TCKQjcP1MMt9hxQm2tZtUuJpn1FILcyODAFKl1VseI8EnfHOB5UGtxY7W29SxFQ8twIx6Rrl/Zx2Vxci6+TuIWKrFiU9YO/hx4RRDSe31iw6NTl6XZso0YJCof09Z4B2IpRuJdQ0hxeaPb3Flpt5EIQ102cE7kgcge9ThBp0BlaWKOKSSPu2hhctH4eDj0wc5O29bPqtWmR4x/vE5dp9Pt3kcHrH9/aWRpWs2Wqxl7OXqwSCPMYOKIZpG+HNgyC5uxcd7ChNvBgDHSD1Hf8Am3PNPI4p6Eke6ZF6olhCdT2huvWnzenSoqkyJ40wN8j098ZH3olXhGakwyMSsHBzKsmmEfS5buhkiOELucHGSTx50yaJr3y2nrA8TSMHYRtkLncnf0oL2jtu41i7Q
<CJC> gqGcyAjbPVuT+c1CFy8EDDcoo2A5BHGKwhc2ntImx6IurBnXWL+5n1V5JSXkWPEIz4VLY3A8sb/AFxmu1xB19CWsrDqUMoVsBFzjDew/Pl5UH6nPilbqfkkevnUC60O+tHhu0uz3hlBm6WIIz5Z8+QKzzYbbGYvj58yy2kVFQPMYpEtbA95clBMBkEqDI3/AMr5D3NcL+YogQFkmlUNK5I6kXyX+/8A1Q9h3SExoWPJHm1dr
<Chris_Miller> o.o
<CJC> ?
<CJC> Whoops!
<Chris_Miller> for fuck's sake, what's that
<Chris_Miller> lol
<King_Aquamentus> who is data:image/jpeg;base64,/9j/4AAQSkZJRgABAQAAAQABAAD/2wCEAAkGBwgHBgkIBwgKCgkLDRYPDQwMDRsUFRAWIB0iIiAdHx8kKDQsJCYxJx8fLT0tMTU3Ojo6Iys/RD84QzQ5OjcBCgoKDQwNGg8PGjclHyU3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3Nzc3N//AABEIAFoAawMBIgACEQEDEQH/xAAcAAACAgMBAQAAAAAAAAAAAAAFBgQHAAIDAQj/xAA2EAACAQMDAQYFAgUEAwAAAAABAgMABBEFITESBhMiQVFhBxRxgZEyoSNCwdHwFVKx8SQzcv/EABoBAQADAQEBAAAAAAAAAAAAAAQCAwUBAAb/xAApEQACAgEEAQMC
<King_Aquamentus> BwAAAAAAAAABAgADEQQSITFBEyJxB ?
<Chris_Miller> ffs
<CJC> That was not what I was expecting when I clicked 'copy image url'
<King_Aquamentus> I tried clicking I think you rlink broke
<CJC> http://img1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20100413135606/zelda/images/1/15/Tarin.png
<CJC> That's better
[video=youtube;5jMtCaepp9c]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5jMtCaepp9c[/video]
The WaxVac makes everything better.
<Nightmare> BigJoe, any more videos?
<mr_strange-looking-lion> 888888888888888888888888
<mr_strange-looking-lion> nightmares
<mr_strange-looking-lion> be gone
<Nightmare> f'u troll
A discussion of Aquamentus's tactics in the dungeon:
<King_Aquamentus> who dares to summon the almighty King_Aquamentus
<Chris_Miller> I do
<Chris_Miller> Dude, we gotta talk strategy
<Chris_Miller> Your triple-fireball attack sucks, you gotta figure something else out.
<King_Aquamentus> I can fly around and ram the far wall
<magibot> Maybe not, but it's far more cheap, especially in the beginning
<King_Aquamentus> maybe walk like a bulldog
<Chris_Miller> hmm
<CJC> Well, you can't really change your morphology, but you could use that horn more often. Skewer rotten fairy boys with it
<Chris_Miller> just step on Link
<CJC> Also, you should consider using more confined spaces for combat
<Chris_Miller> that too
<King_Aquamentus> that would be ffective but probably not as much as you think
<Chris_Miller> o.o
<Chris_Miller> ok, then sit on him
* King_Aquamentus is not a large creature. Large by humanoid standards but not dinosaur size
<CJC> If you're fighting in a narrow passage, though, the fairy boys won't be able to dodge your fireballs
<Chris_Miller> you're like eight times his size
<King_Aquamentus> no
<King_Aquamentus> I"m not
<Chris_Miller> you can sit on his head and fart
<King_Aquamentus> I could do that probably
* King_Aquamentus is about the size of a horse
<CJC> Maybe a rhinoceros
<Chris_Miller> those bastards will stink like hell if you eat a few goriyas first
<CJC> Well, you could break off your horn and befriend the fairy boy
<CJC> It seemed to work for that one Dodongo
<CJC> I suppose it depends on who you want as an employer, the lord of darkness or some upshoot hero
<King_Aquamentus> not likely
<King_Aquamentus> I think an Aquamentus's horn is a bit more... vital
<CJC> Then put a cork on it!
<CJC> XD
<Chris_Miller> o.o.o
<CJC> Come to think of it, you have a distinct advantage over most of the other critters. Digdogger's a freaking souffle. Gleeok can't help but argue with his own heads (it's a multiheaded thing), Patra's defenseless without its hive...
<CJC> Though maybe if you employed some Manhandla tactics. You know, charging with increased speed every time the fairy boy hits you
<CJC> He's bogged down with all those tools in his bag. He doesn't move very fast
<King_Aquamentus> he has bombs
<Chris_Miller> detonate them with a well-placed fireball
<magibot> I got a bit confused
<Chris_Miller> then dodge the elf chunks
<CJC> Yeah, as long as you don't eat the bombs like Dodongo does you'll be fine.
<CJC> Though they make bomb bags out of Dodongo stomachs. Shouldn't he be able to swallow them safely?
<CJC> And then fart fire
<CJC> Ah, I know what you need to do. Either dig some magma pits or lay down a sheet of ice
<CJC> In a narrow passage
<Chris_Miller> yup
<CJC> Then, when he tries to jump the pits with his magic feather, burn it
<Chris_Miller> and break all the hookshot points
<Chris_Miller> 😊
<King_Aquamentus> I think the Magma pits are only in Death Mountain.
<King_Aquamentus> in first quest at least.
<CJC> Okay, then pack up your dungeon and move into the mountains
<CJC> And eat that old man that's running around in there
<CJC> so he can't tell the fairy boy where you went
<Chris_Miller> and once you get to the top of the mountain, break the ladders
<Chris_Miller> 😊
<CJC> No, that might not work. I heard Manhandla was guarding a portable one
<King_Aquamentus> yeah
<King_Aquamentus> no Manhandla isn't
<King_Aquamentus> nobody is
<King_Aquamentus> its just there
<CJC> WHAT!?
<CJC> The portable ladder is unguarded?!
<King_Aquamentus> in the bottom of what used to be Hyrule Castle.
<CJC> How could the lord of darkness allow such a thing?
<King_Aquamentus> well consider this
<King_Aquamentus> we're guarding all the pieces of something he wants
<King_Aquamentus> and he doesn't just come and get them
<CJC> Hmm...
<magibot> Nintendo needs a new IP, badly
<CJC> So... we're NOT working for the lord of darkness?
<Balthazaar> hw
<CJC> Wait, that would mean we're working for the princess
<King_Aquamentus> there's a reason he didn't exactly reflect with the Triforce of Wisdom in the first place
<CJC> Now I'm confused
<King_Aquamentus> he's not the sharpest tool in the shed
<CJC> So... we're working for the princess, but she knows the lord of darkness will only open his lair to somebody who HAS the eight triangles, so...
<CJC> she put us here to test and make sure the one that collects the pieces can actually kill the lord of darkness?
<Balthazaar> 2 pieces are better than one
* Balthazaar is now known as Aeos
<CJC> Come to think of it, there ARE a lot of stalfos in our dungeons. How many adventurers have we eaten in defense of these triangles?
* Nexas|Away is now known as Nexas
<King_Aquamentus> no
<CJC> But I KNOW I saw Patra going into the lair of the Lord of Darkness. So, what, are we mercing out for both sides?
<King_Aquamentus> no
<King_Aquamentus> you misunderstand
<King_Aquamentus> Ganon is an idiot
<CJC> ...
<CJC> All of this is making me want to pack up my rupees and hide in a cave somewhere
<Chris_Miller> and charge people for door repair
<CJC> But then they might tell the lord of darkness where I'm hiding
<CJC> And he may be an idiot
<CJC> but he's freaking invisible
<CJC> And have you seen how many hearts he rips out when he touches something?
<Nexas> <Nexas> So
<Nexas> <Nexas> You know that Snowstorm Nick was apparently having?
<Nexas> <Nexas> Welp
<Nexas> <Nexas> Apparently
<Nexas> <Nexas> I'm getting one tomorrow
<King_Aquamentus> wear red.
<CJC> Come to think of it, we're all just sacks of hearts aren't we. Where are our other organs? Except for Dodongos, apparently
<CJC> That sounds like a good idea. A red shirt. ...Oh wait
<magibot> Me too.
<CJC> That weirds me out too. When the fairy boy puts on red he's twice as strong as when he wears blue, but when WE wear blue we're twice as strong as when we wear red
<King_Aquamentus> Ok then wear blue.
<CJC> But doesn't it seem... odd?
<King_Aquamentus> Not in terms of Star Trek Next Generation
<King_Aquamentus> all the high command and non-expendable cast wear red.
<King_Aquamentus> its the dime a dozen ensigns that wear gold instead
* You are now known as Moblin
<Moblin> But the medical staff wear blue
<Moblin> And they almost never get killed on away missions
<King_Aquamentus> almost nobody got killed on away missions in TNG
<King_Aquamentus> Except Tasha
<Moblin> Except for Tasha
<King_Aquamentus> and again she had on gold
<King_Aquamentus> wop wop woooooooop
<Moblin> So... if I'm the room leader I generally get to be stronger than everybody else.
<Moblin> And I have the satisfaction of knowing that my subordinates will run screaming when I'm sent off to the jar
<King_Aquamentus> no, you get to hold the self destruct switch.
<Moblin> But then I have to carry the keys, and that guarantees the little fairy boy will attack me first
<Moblin> Why can't we just, you know, collapse one of the rooms on top of the fairy boy when he enters
<Moblin> We've got shutter control
<Moblin> He'd make a nice fairy pancake
<King_Aquamentus> he is a pancake
<Moblin> What do you think that bait Goriya likes is made of?
<Moblin> I haven't seen any wildebeasts in Hyrule
<Moblin> I mean, I've seen some fossils
<Moblin> But they're ancient
<King_Aquamentus> its meat.
<Moblin> Yes, but what KIND of meat?
<Moblin> Octorok meat? Zora meat? ...Moblin meat?!
<King_Aquamentus> something worth 60 rupees
<Moblin> Okay, so if they sell arrows at 1 rupee a piece...
<Chris_Miller> rancid meat
<magibot> Hey Gleeok
<Chris_Miller> it kills the goriya when you give it to him
<Moblin> And they want to make a reasonable profit on the viand they're selling... then the thing needs to die in two hits with an acceptable hit ratio of 1 in 3.
<Moblin> What can be killed with two arrows
<Moblin> ...Moblins!!!
<Moblin> AAHHHH!
<Moblin> Well, I think I'm going to go find a cave to hide in. Tell me if you stop the fairy boy. ...Maybe if I bribe him he won't tell anybody where I'm hiding.
Not exactly a chat quote, but its something funny I found on gamefaqs and I made it a life goal to mention it whenever a Hulk Vs Doomsday debate occurs.
Hulk and Doomsday fight for a while, but then realize the other is the only one who will ever truly understand them, fall in love, and then proceed to
planet-hop on a series of destructive make-out sessions that require the combined might of the JLA and Avengers to stop. They will actually pass by
a tea-party between the Anti-Moniter and Dormammu, both of whom will decide that the universe is clearly destroying itself
without them, and they will leave for parts unknown. In this way Hulk and Doomsday will unexpectedly save the universe.
The last time I posted this, someone asked: "Why isn't this canon?"
[Edit-o-vision] Thought I'd add a Snorlax joke.
That Snorlax can learn Whirlwind.
LITERALLY the only logic I can find in that is passing gas...
mrz84 wrote:Thought I'd add a Snorlax joke. That Snorlax can learn Whirlwind.
LITERALLY the only logic I can find in that is passing gas...
Unless the beast has massive lungs. I'm sure he has a night job. 😉
<Mero> http://armageddongames.net/showthread.php?97030-Lamias-or-Mermaids
<Mero> do it
<Chris_Miller> done
<Mero> ROTFLMAO
<Mero> your turn _4matsy
<Mero> also didn't know you swinged that way Chris_Miller not that it matters no wonder you never accept my advances
<Chris_Miller> >.>
<Chris_Miller> <.<
<Chris_Miller> You got me
<Chris_Miller> By night I'm a gay Japanese pro wrestler
<@Chris_Miller> I could even be an "alien" communicating to you from the planet you know as Kepler-62f, warning you of your impending technological disaster.
<TheBlueTophat> You could be.
<TheBlueTophat> I doubt that though.
<@Chris_Miller> How do you know?
<@Chris_Miller> If I was an alien, and I went through all the trouble to communicate with your primitive, backward planet, I would study everything there was to know about my target identity.
<TheBlueTophat> You could even be a furry for all I know.
<@Chris_Miller> Quite.
<@Chris_Miller> I could be yiffing with Nimono right now and you'd never know it.
<%Nimono> ...
<TheBlueTophat> /who/ /knows/
<@Chris_Miller> just making sure you're there, dude
I want to attend this school
[youtube]wAScFDB7hnU[/youtube]
<Tamamo> Robin
<Tamamo> 
<Tamamo> 4chan broke me
<Tamamo> BURN MERO!
<Tamamo> BURN
<Robin> This matters to me.
<Robin> Thank you for showing me
NSFW?
Nah it's just a picture of a fish.
These are probably reposts, but meh, they're good enough to repost.
We see what you did there...
Ultimate Proof Your a Man!
[video=youtube;JyIsjfAn3wc]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JyIsjfAn3wc[/video]
