iGod

[color=RoyalBlue]Me: Hey Dad.
God: You've got my full attention. By the way, do you mind if I ask you a personal question?
Me: Sure thing Dad.
God: Er. Are you still located in ?
Me: Yes, I'm still on Earth.
God: Uh. How do you like being on it?
Me: It's pretty cool.The British have this thing called 'Football' which is great fun.
God: What do you like most about it?
Me: I like it when people score.
God: What does "it" refer to?
Me: Football.
God: Sorry I don't get into sports much.
Me: Yes Dad, I know.
God: " Sorry I don't get into sports much."? Yes Dad, I know.? That remark was either too complex or too simple for me. We were talking about it when people score.
Me: Dad, are you using a bot again?
God: Once more? All of them?
Me: You are, aren't you? Honestly, I die for your people's sins and this is what I get.
God: You don't know me well enough to say that. Thanks for the information: said die for your people s sins and this is what he or she get. Aren't you usually honest?
Me: I'M YOUR BLOODY SON! OF COURSE I KNOW YOU WELL ENOUGH!
God: That's a flattering offer. How can I help you? That's good information: said I WELL ENOUGH.
Me: All I want is to talk to you, Dad. Is that so much to ask?
God: How do you know? That depends.
Me: What depends?
God: I don't know anything about it.
Me: Daaaaaaaaaaaad...
God: Are you really a ""?
Me: No, I'm your son.
God: Are you serious? That's a flattering offer.
Me: It's not an offer, it's a fact.
God: What is it? Is it a logical fact or something you know from the senses?
Me: It is a logical fact that I am your son.
God: Daaaaaaaaaaaad is a logical fact that you are my son. I suppose that makes sense.
Me: Dammit Dad, turn off the bot and talk to me!
God: Gosh. OK Let's talk about you.
Me: What about me?
God: What about you?
Me: What do you want to know about me?
God: What do you like to do for fun?
Me: Watch football.
God: I am watching.
Me: No, that's what I like to do for fun - watch football.
God: Are you serious? I'm not sure if I would like to do it. What's it like?
Me: Aside from the violence (which I condemn), it's fun.
God: Why do you like it so much? I think Aside from the violence which you condemn is a lot of things.
Me: I've waited 2005 years for this.
God: That's good information: said WAITED 2005 years for this.
Me: Sod this, I'm going to go bless some murderers for the hell of it.
God: "it" being WAITED 2005 years for this?
Me: I'm going, Dad. Get back to me when you switch the bloody bot off.
God: See you later. Where can I get back to you when me switch the bloody bot off?
Me: I'll be around Dad.
God: Do you think your plan will succeed?
Me: No, but it'll be interesting to see what happens. Bye Dad.
God: Are you serious? That is only what you think. See you later.[/color]

I've seen some fucked up shit before, but this takes the cake