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More from the silly e-mail department: Warning Labels

2 replies · 947 views · Started 11 August 2005

unfortunately the reason we have all these stupid warnings is because we live in a "sue" happy country .


In Honor of Stupid People . . .
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer --

Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

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On a bag of Fritos --

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)

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On a bar of Dial soap --

"Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....)

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On some Swanson frozen dinners --

"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)

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On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) --

"Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

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On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding --

"Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)

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On packaging for a Rowenta iron --

"Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)

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On Boot's Children Cough Medicine --

"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)

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On Nytol Sleep Aid --

"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(...I'm taking this because???....)

==============================

On most brands of Christmas lights --

"For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?)

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On a Japanese food processor --

"Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

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On Sainsbury's peanuts --

"Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)

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On an American Airlines packet of nuts --

"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: say what?)

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On a child's Superman costume --

"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

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On a Swedish chainsaw --

"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

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Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even chuckle)...

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****

Blessed are the cracked:

For it is they who let in the light

*****

If you're going to blatantly rape a retarded email, at least have the decency to edit out the crap that proves that it's a retarded email.

Axel wrote:Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even chuckle)...