Out Of Context

[Cloral]

Everybody's been walking past someone else in a public space and heard them say something that sounded completely ridiculous out of context. Some are so bizarre you have to stop and think, "What the heck context would make this phrase make any sense at all?"

What are some of the things your friends have said that would sound completely strange to someone who happened to be walking past at the time? I'll give an example: in college a (male) friend of mine said, "Her penis totally dwarfed mine." I'll be back to explain the context of that one later today.

[rock_nog]

One time, back in high school, I was walking down the hallway between classes and overheard someone say "Take care of your colon, and your colon will take care of you." Good advice, yes, but damn, the lack of context haunts me to this day.

[ShadowTiger]

"time penis"

End quote.

[Modus Ponens]

This one actually works pretty well in a vacuum, but I thought I'd share it here anyway.

I was walking past the library on my college's campus, and walking in the opposite direction ahead of me were a guy and a girl. The guy said, "Well, the brain is a muscle, and like any muscle, you have to exercise it," to which the girl replied, "Oh, right, I guess so." Then the guy said, "The brain's not a muscle!" and she laughed and said, "Shut up!" and playfully hit him in the shoulder.

[Brasel]

its always funny to see the reactions of little old ladies when you're talking about your latest attempt at five wanted level stars on grand theft auto 3.

[gdorf]

"If it wasn't for that horse, I never would have spent that year in college"

[/lewisblack]

[Beldaran]

Taken totally out of context:

"... and then once I finished painting my penis blue, I stuck it in a ball of play-dough and then ran around the federal building with my pants off shouting, 'Dingle Berry Pie! Dingle Berry Pie!'"

just kidding I made that up.

[ShadowTiger]

its always funny to see the reactions of little old ladies when you're talking about your latest attempt at five wanted level stars on grand theft auto 3.

Completely Relevant.

[Cloral]

I like that one rock_nog.

The story behind mine is this: I was sitting at dinner with my college friends one evening, and the one friend was talking about a previous game of penis. For those who don't know, penis is a game where you and your friends sit at a table in a public place. The winner is the one who shouts "PENIS!" the loudest - so basically it's a contest to see who is most willing to make an ass of himself or herself. So he was playing the game with a group that included a girl who had no problem making a fool of herself, so she shouted "PENIS!!!" at the top of her lungs. His way of saying that he lost the game big time was to say, "Her penis totally dwarfed mine."

At that time we would often communicate via AIM. Our signatures were collections of quotes from each other. Needless to say, that quote went up to my signature immediately. The next day he messaged me, begging me to remove that quote from my signature.

[Aegix Drakan]

@ ST: ROFL!

I have a few from my firends.


(One of my firends used to be an EA game tester)
Friend: (to the team) Guys. I can't reproduce.
team member: ...what?
Friend: I can't reproduce!
Team member: ...Well...Amada could help with that...
Amanda: Uh...sure?
Friend: ......OH GOSH! NO! I mean I could not reproduce the glitch!!!
Team: *cracks up*

(another friend of mine was out drinking with a couple friends)
Guy: *goes to bar* I'd like a blow job.
Bartender girl: uh...ok, how does 20 buck sound?
Guy: 20 BUCKS FOR A DRINK?!?
Bartender girl: ....OOOOOOOHHH! You mean the DRINK!
Guy: Uh...yeah...I didn't mean...
Bartender Girl: ...You know, I thought you were totally serious. I would have done it too!
Guy: 0_o *goes back to friends* You will NOT believe what just hapenned...


I can't remember any other ATM...