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Thread: Get out the lube...

  1. #1
    Lynel
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    Get out the lube...

    Because Nintendo is ready to bend over, and thoroughly RAPE our Zelda series.

    http://wii.ign.com/articles/920/920705p1.html

    Miyamoto himself commented in an IGN interview that Zelda is "... a franchise that does need some big new unique ideas."
    Oh, you mean bullshit gimmicks like turning into a wolf, and listening to some stupid furry, or going through dumbed down dungeons with some dope ass Jack Sparrow never-was, and fairy on your balls?

    Miyamoto offered those words at E3 2008, where he also confirmed that a new Wii Legend of Zelda game is in development by key members of the Twilight Princess and Phantom Hourglass teams.
    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Phantom Hourglass needs to drop from existance. It was a steaming pile of Moblin shit.

    First, Nintendo is obviously aware that the series needs a new hook or two -- even if Twilight Princess remains ..it lacks a certain freshness, largely because it adheres to the age-old Zelda formula..
    Which works FINE so don't go and fuck it all up - oh, wait, too late.

    it is usually still the same quest with new bells and whistles and it is partially because of this that titles like Twilight Princess and Ocarina of Time feel so similar
    Two points: One, the old formula works fine. It is when they try too hard to be "fresh" when things start sucking... Twilight Princess would have been cool.. minus the dumb fetch quests, and simplistic dungeons, and even easier bosses. Point two: TP is not really like OoT at all. Granted, it does have it beat in size, and overworld (which is one of the things it has going good for it). OoT was awesome simply because it was different, but in the right way. It kept the same formula, and made it 3D. Twilight Princess takes a good formula and adds some annoying character who is on your dick the entire game (and worse off, they try and get you to feel sorry for her, which had me wandering around for a while when she was dying just out of spite. I hoped maybe she would die.) Another reason TP lagged. Nintendo went all bullshitty mainstream with it, and took out some of the more hardcore stuff, and made the game simpler. No complex bosses that actually pose a threat... No having three keys, and choosing your path in a dungeon. No openly exploring Hyrule (at least not until later in the game). It lost a lot in the transition.

    Case in point, you won't see any comparisons to director Eiji Aonuma's first N64 Zelda, Majora's Mask, for that dark and difficult title included an original storyline set outside of the traditional save-the-princess theme.
    This statement alone almost brings me to tears. Imagine if it were true: Any- ANY hope for a Majora's Mask sequel.. gone. Now, we are for sure getting a gimmicky shit pile. This; along with WW was one of the very few times where deviance paid off since it was done right.

    So this article is basically about who people want the series to change. They say they want things like voice acting in a Zelda game. This could go either way depending on whether or not Link stays silent. It's likely he would though. People are saying they want something new, but whenever we get something new, it seem to be gimmicky and mainstreamed to the point where it is lost. Twilight Princess was okay. Phantom Hourglass utterly sucked. This is not a good trend. Even before that, you had Minish Cap which was good, Wind Waker which I loved, then the Oracle games, then Majora's Mask. Somewhere in there, you even had a semi-AlttP sequel in the form of Four Swords Adventures. This was a change, but it worked. Mainly becaus it kept enough the same. I don't think this game was meant to be taken all that seriously though.

    Let's hope this doesn't happen with the Next Zelda. Here's for hoping.

  2. #2
    Patra Beldaran's Avatar
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    I think the part about difficulty was most poignant.

    The problem with modern games is that they cost so much to make, that developers feel pressure to market to the lowest common denominator. They end up making a game that stupid people buy but don't like, and fans want to love but don't like.

    Zelda should be a hard game. That's what made the original Legend of Zelda and Zelda II so much fun. Legend of Zelda was hard, especially for a 10-year old. Those wizzrobes would kick your ass and send you scrambling for that old potion lady. The 2nd quest was even better! Your life-alarm thing is beeping, you're out of potion, and the three headed dragon is in the next room. Your balls are in your stomach and your stomach is in your throat. That was some good gameplay.

    Newer Zeldas are kind of fun, but you'd have to have down syndrome to fail to beat them. They are really easy, even the harder parts only take a few tries to get right.

    I also agree about the story. There is no reason Zelda games shouldn't have an awesome and cohesive story. The fantasy setting just begs for it.

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    Gibdo aces2022's Avatar
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    Ya Phantom Hourglass sucked. But how do you get bigger than having moon from falling on Hyrule and destroying the planet but then getting four giants to push it back into orbit? The thing in the article that says it would like to see more than just on the surface features of Link kinda catches my attention, but catching the true Link without narrative would be extremely hard thing to do. Miyamoto has said before that he WILL NOT have Link talk. It would kinda destroy his picturesque being.
    Live forever or die trying.
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    Octorok g.iaroos's Avatar
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    They need to make a new 2D zelda with clever dungeons and release it on the virtual console, like Capcom did with MM9.

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    Lynel Revfan9's Avatar
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    Zelda? Nintendo canceled that series a long time ago. Twilight Princess and onward were all made by some pirates, who also made the CD-i Zeldas.

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    Wizrobe rock_nog's Avatar
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    Part of the problem with difficulty, too, is that we've just gotten better. I remember when I was a kid thinking that Zelda 3 was just this epic, monstrous thing that really challenged me - fast forward to when I got it on VC, after not playing it for years, not remembering the layouts to the dungeons or the bosses or anything, and I just breezed through it.
    The artist formally known as macweirdo42, formally known as weirdguy (it's a long, uninteresting story).

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    Death Knight MottZilla's Avatar
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    After Majora's Mask, I stopped really caring. I know there was a big deal about Twilight, but by that time I wasn't very hopeful. I mean OoT was good back in the day. But part of that was the whole 3D being new. Zelda really is a 2D game, similar to Metroid really. It just doesn't translate to 3D very well. Though Metroid faired better I think.

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    Lynel
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    They end up making a game that stupid people buy but don't like, and fans want to love but don't like.
    This is a good point. It basically summarizes my point. Unfortunately, I doubt Nintendo will drop the mainstream theme any time this decade, which is sad when you watch your favorite series suffer dearly.

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    Octorok g.iaroos's Avatar
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    Quote Originally Posted by Tobias_Daboi View Post
    This is a good point. It basically summarizes my point. Unfortunately, I doubt Nintendo will drop the mainstream theme any time this decade, which is sad when you watch your favorite series suffer dearly.
    Yeah, see you in 201X nintendo! When robot masters will start roaming the city, maybe you'll change your mind!

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    Karate guys for cash. Aegix Drakan's Avatar
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    Re: Get out the lube...

    OY....

    Look, although I think TP was a great game...it lacked a lot. IMHO, Okami pwns TP with all four paws tied down. It had everything that TP lacked (minus the difficulty that leads to "hey feeling hof accomplishment (~Yatzee)")

    And that's something I whole heartedly jump on the bandwagon about. TP had the perfect difficulty.......FOR AN EASY MODE. when the last boss does a pretty impressive looking attack, and you panic as the attack blasts into you...you expect to lose at least a whole heart. Hell, I was expecting 3! ...but no, I got nailed with an impressive looking attack and walked away with only half a heart less. ...There's got to be something done. give us an easy mode and an expert mode, please! I don't want to have to skip out on heart containers just to make the game even remotely challenging (aside from ONE, maybe TWO tough calls. [The first encounter with a darknut, and the first encounter with that flying shielded lizard thingy.]. I think the only time I even died was in the mines, when I missed the first few jumps up somehow and landed in the roaring magma 3 freaking times!

    And as interested as I am in the possibility of having 1:1 swordfighting...I am INCREDIBLY worried that nintendo is going to overuse it and then it will be a hassle just to kill a regular enemy! If it's doone well, it could be awesome, but I think it's within my rights to be a little bit worred about it all.


    And lastly, I thought Phantom hourglass was a pretty good (albeit freaking short and easy) handheld zelda game. Nowhere near as awesome as Link's awakening, but still a decent addition to the DS. A few extra dungeons would have been VERY welcome though.

    I DO hope that they take liberties with the story again. I mean, that's one of the things that made Majora's mask awesome. It was not the SAVE PRINCESS FROM GANON tale that we've hear about a good hundred times. In fact, if they do pull that again, I will have to call shenanigans, because IMO, Ganon is now officially dead in BOTH timelines, and I think we need to move on from that front.

    Oh, and voice acting is a bad bad idea. Those who feel that having to READ reminds you that you are playing a game were either born with no imagination, or have had it sucked out by halo and its siblings. I don't want vioce acting to even TOUCH the series, unless it's just a one liner you hear when you talk to an NPC ("yeah, what is it?" "Is something up?" ETC.)

    TLDR: This game better have some kind of hard mode, a fresh variation on the story, and NO FREAKING VOICE ACTING. The main formula of going from dungeon to dungeon getting items and becoming more and more lethal, however, needs to stay if it can even call itself a ZELDA game!
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