XP fridge...

[obi]

What If you had XP running your house? Let’s go into the future and see –

originally found in PC Format magazine
[In the kitchen of the future. Mr Quincunx is putting his shopping away:-]
Mr Q: Wow, it’s great living in the future. Everything runs on windows XP and broadband internet connection – even my iron!
And my groceries have smart labels so my fridge knows what they are and when to order fresh stuff from the supermarket. It’s brilliant!
[he shoves some broccoli in the fridge]
Fridge: Warning! Broccoli dangerously close to sell-by date! Consume immediately!
Mr Q [tapping of the fridge display]: No, it’s ok. It was on special offer. It has another couple of days left in it, I’m sure.
Fridge: Warning! Broccoli dangerously close to sell-by date! Consume immediately!
Mr Q: Oh for pity’s sake.
[removes the broccoli]
Fridge: Broccoli removed for consumption. Downloading broccoli recipes. Ordering replacement broccoli. Stand by.
Mr Q: Eh? I don’t need more broccoli! Where did I put the manual?
[Microwave comes to life]
Microwave: Receiving… Receiving… Receiving…Done. Welcome to Delia’s How to cook broccoli. Please select a recipe.
Mr Q: What? I don’t want to cook the bloody broccoli! And it’s only 11 o’clock in the morning? Why the hell would I want too cook broccoli now?
Fridge: Broccoli order confirmed. Delivery in progress.
Mr Q: No! I don’t want any more broccoli! I don’t even like it much! I only got it because it was on special offer!
[runs to the fridge, in doing so, he knocks an open carton of orange juice over himself and the fridge]
Mr Q: Oh hell, I covered in orange juice. Well, I’ll just have to shove all of my clothes in the washing machine.
[strips off all of clothes and stuffs it in the washing machine]
Fridge: Warning! Leakage detected! Contacting service engineers! Pleasebcshdv… Ordering…Ordering…Replacement Brcci…
Mr Q: Sod this.
[unplugs the fridge]
Washing Machine: Attention! White pants in coloured wash! Aborting the wash cycle!
Microwave: Please select a broccoli recipe.
Mr Q: SHUT UP!
[he lunges at the microwave, slips on a puddle of orange juice and knocks himself out on one of the corners of the washing machine.
Some time later, the doorbell rings]
Mr Q: Oh bugger. That’ll be the broccoli. I’m nude, better put some clothes on.
[door rings again]
Mr Q: Hell, need clothes, that’ll do.
[he grabs his wife’s negligee]
Mr Q *looking down*: Ah, not long enough. Need something to cover up…bits…
[he grabs the broccoli to cover up his, errr, bits,
rushes to the door and flings it open as it rings again]
Mr Q: All right, hand it over! I’ve already got some though, see?
The Vicar: Hello Mr Quincunx! I’ve come to talk to you about God and…
[he looks at Mr Q up and down]
Ooh, crikey!
Mr Q: Ooh, crikey!
A crowd of broccoli delivery men and service engineers who have just arrived [in unison]: Ooh, crikey!
[Mr Q faints, just as his wife comes up the garden path and takes in the scene]
Mrs Q: I want a divorce.

I couldn’t stop laughing!

[Menokh]

LMAO!
Let's hope that doesn't happen ever.

When I saw this topic I was thinking more along the lines of:

Suddennly the ice despenser on my new XP fridge started to spit ice cubes out at 50 miles per hour. I went over and banged on the fridge a few times, to no avail, so I pressed the abort button on the ice despensor. Then the fridge said, "IceD has performed and illegal operation and needs to close. We are sorry for any inconvenience this may cause."
Then the ice despenser promptly blew up and spit more ice all over the room.
I then realized it was time to get a Linux fridge....

[richeva]

Obi, did you type this out yourself?
If so, you have WAY too much free time on your hands.

[CH@O$]

Rich it sats he got it from a computer magazine, duh

[goKi]

haha, very good! gotta iron out some... glitches.

[Hessian]

I personaly have had minimal problems with XP so I don't get what you are complaining about. XP has only performed an illegal operation on glitchy morpheus and I have ran XP for weeks without incident.

[obi]

Originally posted by Hessian
I personaly have had minimal problems with XP so I don't get what you are complaining about. XP has only performed an illegal operation on glitchy morpheus and I have ran XP for weeks without incident.

I'm not complaining about anything man, this is just a funny article that i saw and i though I should put it up.:)

Of course, if this were true, then, if you went round your friends
XP house to find them sitting in the middle of their room, with a campfire going, their reply may be -
'I forgot my password'
Hee, hee.

XP is only good as an OS.

[vegeta1215]

Originally posted by Menokh
LMAO!
Let's hope that doesn't happen ever.

When I saw this topic I was thinking more along the lines of:

Suddennly the ice despenser on my new XP fridge started to spit ice cubes out at 50 miles per hour. I went over and banged on the fridge a few times, to no avail, so I pressed the abort button on the ice despensor. Then the fridge said, "IceD has performed and illegal operation and needs to close. We are sorry for any inconvenience this may cause."
Then the ice despenser promptly blew up and spit more ice all over the room.
I then realized it was time to get a Linux fridge....

Same here!

[Daarkseid]

Originally posted by Hessian
I personaly have had minimal problems with XP so I don't get what you are complaining about. XP has only performed an illegal operation on glitchy morpheus and I have ran XP for weeks without incident.

Same here, I've been using XP for a month now and nothing has ever crashed. Some program have stalled, but the more versatile ctrl+alt+del system makes figuring out problems with programs easier.

This isn't to say XP will fuck up eventually though when memory starts to get used up more. The exact same thing occurred with ME on my other PC and by 6 months later, if RAM use wasnt' properly monitored and controlled, ME would crash over everything.

XP may not have these same problems for me, so I'll have to use it longer to find out.

One thing the future paragraph did have to say though I find frighteningly similar to XP is the constant updates and reminders and then the offers to get update software and reporting of incidents to Microsoft over the net. That part is what really connected with me.

[eastness21]

Xp isn't compatible wit enough stuff though. Like I recently got satelite internet and it was really hard to finally get it working with Xp for some reason. And the stupid product activation thing sucks, even though you can get it so you can fake activate it. But I'm not saying Xp sucks on the whole.