It's your fucking birthday

[Dechipher]

Yeah, boi

Happy Birthday to Ctrl+Alt+Del, also known as Kolt. He's like 22 now. Or something stupid like that.

[odinson]

well happy birthday ctl+alt+del

[Nicholas Steel]

Well, happy birthday CTRL-ALT-DELETE


*watches computer POST again*

[Archibaldo]

Happy Birthday man, and here, a birthday related YouTube video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzoA-xFU2j8).

[Aegix Drakan]

Happy B-day Ctrl-alt-delete!

Whatever would we do without those three keys? XD

[rock_nog]

Happy birthday! And damnit, I guess now we'll never know the consequences of a lack of birthday thread.

[erm2003]

Happy birthday!

[The_Amaster]

Heeey, happy birthday Kolt.

[Russ]

Happy Birthday, oh one that closes my programs. :D

[Prrkitty]

Happy birthday hon :) May the day bring you lots of goodies :) Oh and goodness too :)

[ctrl-alt-delete]

See what had happened was, I got arrested.

I'm at work right now...story to come.

[Dechipher]

Holy shit.

I gotta hear this.
Hopefully nothing too permanent...

[Brasel]

lol, arrested, birthday stories can't ever be bad.

[ShadowTiger]

I still wish you a happy birthday.

Great video, Dave. Love those guys.

[biggiy05]

See what had happened was, I got arrested.

I'm at work right now...story to come.

This is gonna be hilarious.

[Zaphod Q. IX]

This is gonna be hilarious.
*is still waiting*

[Modus Ponens]

Yeah, come on, CAD, deliver.

[Master Ghaleon]

Happy bday, hope Bubba from the cell gave ya a nice treat ;)

[ctrl-alt-delete]

I've been drunk and high for four days, it's hard to tell stories...

Tomorrow for sure.

[ctrl-alt-delete]

Long story short:

Okay, so I'm having a huge party at my house with upwards of 40 guests...

The majority of the guests are underage minors which are consuming alcohol.

Music too loud, people outside smoking too loud, cops show up.

They tell us since this is the 5th time they've been out, that they are either writing us a fine or waiting outside until all the guests leave and they will talk to every single one of them for "suspicion."

My roommate comes to tell me our two options...I choose option number 1, telling him to tell them to write the fucking ticket and leave, and no matter what, do not let them in the house.

The douchebag police officer asks if he can enter the residence and my roommate tells him no, go away.

So he starts yelling at the top of his lungs, "Fine, this is fucking bullshit...blawdy fucking blawdy oink i'm pissed i'm going to sit out here all night..."

So he leaves and posts up this lady cop at the end of the driveway next door.

Naturally, some of my guests are spooked, so they decide to leave.

They get pulled over, their car gets searched for suspicion, and they get a ticket written for "floating a stop sign."

I make all of my guests go down to the den so everyone can get all the stories straight...who's in trouble, etc.

I tried to get everyone to shutup, but they wouldn't, no matter how many times I asked...

Meanwhile, two of my roommates that are legally able to drink are standing outside in the driveway drinking with two other guests that are also legally able to drink.

Realizing that nobody is going to shutup, and the cop is going to be outside all night because it is so fucking loud, I decide to take matters into my own hands.

I go out to the cops passenger window and ask her to move her vehicle so my guests can safely leave. She says I'm not moving, I'm a bitch, etc.

So I start cussing her out at the top of my lungs, spitting out law after law to which she replies, "Yeah, you're right...you're right...can't argue with you, you're right."

Jeff and Asa, my two roommates, are standing behind me the whole time...

The quote of the night was me telling her, "You can't fucking argue with me, I'm a fucking genius!"

Anyways, I told her to move her car again...she wouldn't listen, so I decided to dial 911 to have another officer dispatched to decide if she should in fact move her car so my guests can leave.

Jeff and Asa walk away for a minute...the lady cop tells me that somebody is going to jail, and that if I want to be the face of the party, that can be me and they'll leave...

In the meantime, she calls back the douchebag guy...

He gets there, pulls out his flashlight, and shines it in my face.

I tell him that's not threatening...I look to her and said, "Maybe you should try it though...might have made you a little more threatening."

He asks me what the problem is, I start to explain it to him...

He is standing in the middle of the street and says, "Come over here and talk to me!"

Trap.

I obey, and as soon as I get to him, he says, "Now you're drunk in public...DO YOU WANT TO GO TO JAIL?"

Which I accidentally reply yes to, hilarity ensues.

I tell him I don't want to go to jail, I just want my guests to be able to safely leave...

All the while, I'm thinking, "If I just go to jail, they'll leave...they can't pin anything on me but a public intox, which I can fight easy...if I don't go to jail, they could arrest my guests and try to charge me with providing alcohol to minors...etc."

He finally tells me to turn around, arrests me, takes me to jail, does all the booking shit, puts me in a small little room for about 4 hours, and then they release me.

Happy 22nd birthday!

[Masamune]

Oh no. :( That's some fucked up shit, man. Never trust a cop. Even though their job is supposedly to protect you, in reality, their job is to fuck you over and make your life difficult.

[Dechipher]

Meh

[FirstWizZedd45]

Yes... You are in fact still a bitch for not coming. That was still a pretty fucking awesome party!

[Dechipher]

Who is this fool?

[biggiy05]

Who is this fool?

Apparently someone who just called you a bitch. Are you seriously going to take that? I mean we know you're a bitch but come on, fight back.

[FirstWizZedd45]

Oh, yeah... Sorry, I'm Jeff, Kolt's roomate, I also own the house, and was in the story. Jaime, everytime you saw Kolt at the movies, I was the guy sitting next to him.

[Dechipher]

Meh

[Masamune]

Kolt goes to movie with men and then I fucks with his mother lolololololol.

[ctrl-alt-delete]

Kolt goes to movie with men and then I fucks with his mother lolololololol.

I go to the movie with a crowd of like 50 people, including your mom.

[Masamune]

Jokes on you, Kolt. My mom hates movies and most other social engagements because she's a bitch.

[Dechipher]

Jokes on you, Kolt. My mom hates movies and most other social engagements because she's a bitch.

That sounds more like the jokes on you...

[ctrl-alt-delete]

Jokes on you, Kolt. My mom hates movies and most other social engagements because she's a bitch.

She didn't come for the movie...

She just came. Know what I'm sayin'?

[Modus Ponens]

I don't get it. Please explain.

[Masamune]

She didn't come for the movie...

No, asshole. Before you said she did come for the movie. Her and like 50 other people. Stop changing your story.

[ctrl-alt-delete]

I go to the movie with a crowd of like 50 people, including your mom.


No, asshole. Before you said she did come for the movie. Her and like 50 other people. Stop changing your story.

Never said she came for the movie.

General Discussion, man. Not General Bitching. Take it easy.

[MasterSwordUltima]

You were implying that his mother was part of the crowd, and their intentions were to see a movie.

Masamune wins.

[Masamune]

I was only j/k, cad. :( No ill will meant.

[ctrl-alt-delete]

I was only j/k, cad. :( No ill will meant.

It's okay. I'll have your mom spank you later...the way she spanked me on my birthday. ;)

I love you, Pat.