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View Full Version : I miss you Zoei...



War Lord
04-04-2008, 12:03 AM
http://www.armageddongames.net/warlord/zoei_web.jpg

I bought Zoei as a surprise to my wife. We already had a 3 year old fawn male pug and she had always wanted a black female pug. She was absolutely thrilled at the addition. Our other pug was weary at first but they quickly became best buddies.

Zoei started acting abnormal on Friday March 28th, 2008. She wouldn’t jump down from the bed, or the couch. She was also very hesitant to go down the stairs. She had no problems jumping up on the bed or couch, nor going up the stairs. Our other pug had sprained his back and did similar things, so we just gave Zoei a little children’s Tylenol and monitored her. She was very sleepy all weekend, barely playing with our other pug. Normally, all she did was play with him during her waking hours, even if he didn’t want to.

On Sunday, my wife awoke to Zoei apparently choking. She rubbed her throat and it seemed to be fine. I awoke later that day to Zoei throwing up on the floor. It was mostly brown liquid, so I just assumed it was her reacting to the Tylenol, and I wouldn’t give her any more. I was in the kitchen this day as well, when Zoei walked in and just peed on the kitchen floor. This was unusual for her as she would always go on one of the puppy pads throughout the house if she absolutely had to go now. Later this afternoon she also pooped on the kitchen floor. Again, very abnormal.

Monday morning I took Zoei to the vet. I told them all that had been going on, and they gave her a shot and sent me home with some pills. Later this evening Zoei seemed to be back to normal, though still not jumping off of the couch, she was very excited when we came home or a guest came over and she even was playing with a toy along with our other pug.

I was at work Tuesday morning when my wife called and said she came back from the bathroom to find Zoei sitting on the bed shaking and just staring at the wall. I told her to calm down and see if Zoei would eat or drink. She sat Zoei on the floor by her food bowl and she just collapsed to the floor. My wife said she also would not stop craning her neck as if it were hurting her. Our vet wasn’t in that day, however the vet her parent’s use was. I told her to calm down and that Zoei would be fine, just to give me a call when they found out something.

My wife’s mother called me which I immediately knew was a bad sign. She said Zoei’s shaking had gotten worse and she was not reacting to any of the seizure medicines. She was on a constant valium IV. The only time anything seemed to work was if she was sleeping because of the valium. She said the vet was fairly certain that she had Pug Dog Encephalitis. She said we could go to an emergency animal hospital and have her spinal fluid checked to see if she did indeed have it. I immediately lost it. The thought of losing that beautiful little girl was too much to bear for me. I rushed from work to the vet’s office.

After speaking to the vet, my options were to leave her there on the IV and see how things went, or rush her over to the emergency place to have the tests done. My wife asked me if I wanted to see Zoei now, and I couldn’t do it. There’s no way I could have handled it. I decided to leave her on the IV and go home to read a bit about PDE. As I got home and read a bit more, it seemed Zoei had just about every Pre-Seizure symptom that comes with PDE. The only difference being that most dogs have a seizure for a few seconds then it’s gone for a little while. Zoei had been seizuring all day long basically. We could pay to go have those tests done, to find out she did indeed have it, and then my option would be to have her put to sleep. I figured it’d be better to bring her home, and see how it went for a day or two.

I spoke with the vet when we got back and told him what we planned to do. He said it wouldn’t be any more of a charge to leave her on the IV and monitored until they closed at 6 so we chose to leave her and come back again. I did however want to see her so they brought her out. When they brought her out I lost it again. She was just shaking and whining constantly. It was horrible. After we got home and I read more I was almost positive she had PDE. I spoke with my wife and told her that if we brought her home and she was just going to shake and whine all night, that wasn’t fair to Zoei.

We went back to the vet around 5:30 and the vet said she was still just shaking and not reacting well to much of anything. If we took her home, it would be a sleepless night of Zoei shaking and crying. We made the decision to put her to sleep. I couldn’t let her go through that anymore. This is for sure the hardest decision of my life. A 7 month old pug should not go from happy and full of life to hanging on barely in a matter of a weekend. This was our baby girl, but we had to do what was best for her.

We held her in our lap as she took her last breath, crying and shaking. I know it was best but I just can’t believe it. She was such a great dog, and just plain amazing. I feel like there’s this empty part of me knowing she won’t be there anymore. It’s slowly getting better but it’s so hard day to day. The first night was the worst. I had no composure whatsoever. Pugs are lickers, but Zoei licked all the time and everything. She would always lick my pillow for at least 5 or 10 minutes every night before bed. Our other pug had never done anything like this but that night he licked my pillow for a good 10 minutes. I absolutely cried like a baby as he did it.

I’ll never be able to bring Zoei back, but I would much rather have known her for the 6 months we had her then to have never had her at all. She was an amazing little dog, and will be loved and remembered forever. We chose to have her cremated and should have her back home where she belongs next week. We already had what pictures we had of her printed and got 2 frames that hold 9 4x6 prints each and filled them with her pictures. I also had the vet get a lock her hair so we could have it custom framed with a picture as well.

I miss you Zoei, and I hope you’re happier now, and resting peacefully.
I've been a wreck all week, and though it is slowly getting slightly better, I'm not sure sometimes still how I'll get along without her. I think having our other pug has been great for support, but he isn't Zoei.

rock_nog
04-04-2008, 12:20 AM
*tear* I feel for you man, I really do. God, there's nothing worse than losing a pet, especially like that. The thing about pets is, you can never really fault them for anything. Even when they're complete asses, you always forgive 'em. Hell, my family just lost a basset hound recently, and he was a rotten little bastard, but it was nothing you could hold against him, because no matter how horribly a pet behaves, it never really is, is it? Anyway man, I feel for your loss. Take care!

Beldaran
04-04-2008, 12:21 AM
As a fellow pet person, condolences all around. I know what it's like to bury/cremate your best little friend. It's one of the worst things ever. Here's to Zoei. [raises drink]

EDIT: I remember when my cat of 16 years died. I sobbed horribly, then spent like three days just sitting in my room doing nothing. It sucks.

Breaker
04-04-2008, 03:51 AM
I'm not sure what I would do if anything happened to my little Nanook (http://i26.tinypic.com/10ddq1z.jpg).

ctrl-alt-delete
04-04-2008, 09:51 AM
Wow, I am really sorry to hear that. I have always lived in a family of animal lovers, so I know how hard it is to lose one of them.

Probably about six months ago, my family lost their Pomeranian-Poodle, Cinnamon. She was the cutest dog ever, and it broke my moms heart to bury her.

Anyways, hopefully over time you will be able to better accept what happened...Just be comforted knowing that she is not in anymore pain.

Archibaldo
04-04-2008, 10:58 AM
It sucks losing pets. When I was kid we had to put our family cat down because of tumor in his neck. It's a shame that cat was quite the fighter. He got hit by a car twice and lived long afterwards until the tumor.

And then shortly after, my dog lost the use of his back legs and couldn't walk anymore. We had to put him down. It sucks how susceptible pets are to these kinds of things.

MrCow
04-04-2008, 11:44 AM
I've lost two cats to kidney failure, two dogs to cancer (both far too young), and a few other dogs from old age. All of them except one dog we had to put down because they just got to the point where they couldn't even move anymore. One dog had cancer twice and the second time never woke up from the surgery. That one was the hardest on me because he was my dog when I was younger. It's never easy and it never gets easier, but you'll always have the memories. The last dog we had to have put down from cancer/kidney failure was tough too. She had a great personality and was very protective of all of us. I still miss all of them to this day and I don't want to even think about any of the 4 I have now in the same boat. We did have one dog that had seizures a lot and she lived for quite some time, but there was always scary times where shed just start shaking and we had to rush to stop it.
My thoughts are with you and your wife, warlord.

Lilith
04-04-2008, 12:14 PM
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Prrkitty
04-04-2008, 02:32 PM
Hon... she's not happier where she is and I'm sure she'd rather be with you and the rest of her family... but... she is not in anymore pain. Ultimately you did what was best for Zoei. And even if you had spent all the money and ran all the tests available... the outcome would most probably have still been the same. And you didn't let or make her suffer anymore then she had already. :)

I have also had to put some of my dogs to sleep... two of my previous dogs actually. They, as well, breathed their last breath in my arms and both are buried up on the hill of the back yard of my parents land.

To this day I still cry when I think of Foxy, my 4lb Pomeranian who went into kidney failure. And when the vet told me it was time... we ended his misery. That was 1987.

I promise the pain of their absence does get easier. Even 10 or 20 or even 30 years from now when you think back... you'll still tear up. But that is a testament of just how much you loved your Zoei.

It does get easier...

Pineconn
04-04-2008, 03:51 PM
War Lord, I'm sorry to hear this. I've never had a pet, and while I'll never have the enjoyment and vivacity of a pet, I'll never have to go through losing one.

If anything good were to come out of this, you at least know that you did absolutely nothing wrong taking care of Zoei. I'm no counselor, but I would suggest taking the time to consider getting a new dog. Because you know that you took care of Zoei correctly, you know that another sudden tragedy such as this won't happen again. The morality of "replacement" may be questionable, so I'll say no more.

The_Amaster
04-04-2008, 03:56 PM
ohhh...man...
Yeah, that sucks really bad. I know how you feel, as does it seems everyone else, but hey, we've all lost pets and it really isn't easy.
Can't think of what I can say that hasn't been said yet...
Man, sorry to hear about that...

Aegix Drakan
04-04-2008, 07:48 PM
My condolences War Lord.

:( It's never easy losing a pet. It's like they become family. I hope the pain will fade away soon enough, leaving only the good memories behind.

Amber
04-04-2008, 07:57 PM
I'm not sure what I would do if anything happened to my little Nanook (http://i26.tinypic.com/10ddq1z.jpg).

I would be extremely sad.. :(

moocow
04-04-2008, 09:04 PM
:( *hug*

vegeta1215
04-05-2008, 01:02 PM
Sorry for your loss War Lord :( I hope everything will be alright. It's really hard to lose a loved one, especially a family pet. We lost our first Golden Retriever a few years ago, and I still get choked up thinking about the night he died. But he's in a better place now.

Gle+n*2
04-06-2008, 12:32 AM
My cat is far beyond his average life expectancy.

At 19 years of age, he could fall over dead at any moment. He's been with me since I was 5 years old, and while he is generally in good health, he has urinary tract problems, a cataract over one eye, and has become virtually deaf. I've often tried to figure out how I'll feel when he dies, and I don't think it will be anywhere near as bad as what War Lord described.

By the way, his name is E.B.

He's probably older than most of you, so please be respectful and refer to him as Mr. B.