If you were a fortress master, how would you defend it?

[ShadowTiger]

After seeing all these amazing ads for Aeon Flux on TV, I can't help but be somewhat inspired. It's amazing to see all of those creative and unique ideas to defend a location from would-be intruders.


If you were in control of a fortification of some sort, what devious traps and hinderances would you employ to stop intruders?

[ONeilcool]

I would say a river of gas, thats burns.With an on and off switch for the fire so you could give the intruders a chance to try and run across, but in the last few steps burn um, literally. I got this idea from Dane Cook and what a wonderful idea it is. If I got the chance I would build it.

[Archibaldo]

Well first of all, I would have Adamantium walls and doors so my fortress would be indestructable. Then if the intruder does manage to get in, I'd have a laser grid like in the Resident Evil movie in every corridor. If they manage to get past that, I'd have back up gas vents that would pour in gas that completely paralyzes you if inhaled, then I'd question them and find out how they got in. Take that information to upgrade my defences and then kill them.

[algam86]

A rising floor in a long hallway. It starts from both sides of the hallway when an intruder reaches the middle of it, and eventually crushes them between it and the ceiling. They can't escape if they're sealed in, you know.

[Daarkseid]

Bees. Lots and lots of Bees. And massive hives of them, everywhere.

[ShadowTiger]

I'm a rather cruel overlord occasionally, and like to toy with my prey before I slaughter them mentally, then physically. Remember, you have to think from the perspective of the intruders (of all manners of intelligence.) in order to gain the edge before they even attack.

The first thing I would focus on is the primary entrance on the surface, farthest from the core of your fortification. One half / side would be sufficiently impenetrable by anyone, while the other half would be in relatively open space, and relatively easily accessed. It would be surrounded by a lush green lawn, (You can already tell that the blades of grass are actual blades.) But the little cement pathway would be lined with odd metallic devices, which actually do nothing at all. Same thing with the inner wall. You've got -tiny- little airducts with which to crawl through, but they're all extremely trapped, while the main entrance just looks more threatening than it really is.

The inner compound is roughly the opposite though. The main entrance into the inner inner compound will look totally LESS threatening, with the airducts looking completely like they'll just devour you alive, .. ... while the same danger scheme is applicable above. Just walk right through the main entrance and you'll be fine.

... ...

But then on the inner compound I've got ZC's Death Knights. Nobody will survive. Not even the owners of the compound. ... Damn, those death knights are so hard. ;_;'

[Goat]

Shotguns and razor wire. Works for the military, noone is bad ass enough to get passed that.

[Dart Zaidyer]

Two words:

Guardian Trogdor.

[Rainman]

Bees. Lots and lots of Bees. And massive hives of them, everywhere.

That could be easily thwarted by smoke.

[Daarkseid]

That could be easily thwarted by smoke.

Oh, most inconvenient.

[Brasel]

Two words:

Guardian Trogdor.
NOONE CAN CONTROL TROGDOR!! NOONE! HE IS THE BURNINATOR!

I would hire evil henchmen and have lazer doors. You know, like in the Phantom Menace, except when you tried to run into these doors, they would fry you...and they'd be invisible. You couldn't see them. The only way a person could know if the doors were there or not was if they knew exactly where to look on the door frame for a secret light thingy or something.

I'm really terrible at coming up with things like this.

[Aegix Drakan]

I'd build my fortress like a zelda dungeon. Alot of puzzles, and guards and such.
Then, Id make a room only I can get through. (requires my personal keycard to get through.) I'd make the entrance a one way shutter, and fill the room with Deathknights armed with lightsabers, and set up a trigger so that if in the unlikely evetnthe guy beats them all, the whole floor turns into a lava pool. and If the guy somehow manages to get past that, He still has to get past my pet dragon.

but then again, that's not really possible is it?

[ShadowTiger]

... ... Oh, ... It is, but you'd have to use events, and a little bit of combo cycling.

... (Inside joke. :p )



I think for my next iteration of this fortress, I'll experiment with mirrors and illusions. I remember this old episode of Tale Spin (Tail Spin? whatever.) where their primary craft is flying in the air, as usual, but suddenly like, .. there's this BLINDING flash of light, and the world turns upside down! You could slice the fear in the air with a knife, damnit. Wow.

Disorientation of varying degrees would be a great kick in the nuts, particularly if the armed guards firing directly at you aren't disoriented in the process. Man. That's so cruel.

Hell, it'd be awesome to stack disorientation on top of disorientation. Damn, that could really hurt.

[Aegix Drakan]

I'm putting the "lava floor" in my quest, but it is only in one boss fight, and is only activated if you break the rules of the duel (yes you are dueling someone).

For my fortress, I would also but in a squard of SHadow the hedgehog clones as guards. (no one can survive that)

[Cloral]

I'd have someone outside with a mouse cursor, ready to grab anyone who approached and fling them up into the air.

Hey, it works in the arcade...

[koopa]

I'd go for Prince-of-persia 1 style "choppers" and spikes.

[Verman]

Richard simmons, dancing...naked....

[ShadowTiger]

Richard simmons, dancing...naked....
Verman Wins.

Cloral is in close second.

Daark finishes in a respectable third, because nobody likes bees.

YEAH! TO HELL WITH YOU, RAINMAN.... ... Bees, conscious or not. ;)



Going with koopa's idea, I'd recommend room after room after room of seemingly empty chambers, where if you even so much as empty it, the floor falls out to reveal spikes all over the floor. Then the room floods, and the ceiling crushes downward. Either get impaled, or drown.

[Breaker]

The Aeon Flux film adaptation is an abomination. I would have it playing on a big screen infront of the fortress spewing suck on all intruders that came across it. otherwise all other doors would be left opened so they could come in and kill me, because fuck if I'd want to live after seeing it either. :|

[Daarkseid]

Daark finishes in a respectable third, because nobody likes bees.


YEAH! TO HELL WITH YOU, RAINMAN.

[g.iaroos]

The command center would be just a big decoy (the real one not even being in the fortress) and anyone coming in will be greeted by doors locking, a flat screen displaying OWNED ... and the next thing they now is that they've been squished by the ceiling :P

[Beldaran]

Since we are being completely unrealistic, I would just make it so that if someone broke in they inexplicably died horribly and suddenly.

[ShadowTiger]

Since we are being completely unrealistic, I would just make it so that if someone broke in they inexplicably died horribly and suddenly.Well, Bel's certainly right. The only reason we're creating all these elaborate traps is to test our own creativity. If we actually wanted to repel intruders, we'd just turn a freaking laser ray on them or something. Toying with your prey gives them time to escape. Putting a four inch hole in their forehead gives them considerably less time to ponder their situation.

Of course, where's the fun in that? ;) :rolleyes:

[Sir_Johnamus]

Level 1:Flamethrower doors. They shoot fire when a piece of matter touches the tripwires.
Level 2:Lava Moat. It has a tightrope 2 inches in diameter, made of nylon, so the smell...
Level 3:Ninjas, about 9 or 10.
Level 4:Spiked ceiling/walls that close in at 35 feet/s.
Level 5:Really big razor pendullum.
Level 6:More ninjas; 35 this time.
Level 7:Seemingly endless laberynth. It's an illusion.
Level 8:N/A. No One should get this far.

[AlexMax]

A locked door, and a locked down table in front of it, so nobody can get in.

[VI3T_DR@GON]

I would put a mine field before the place, so if they even thought about getting in, they would probably die. Then if they walked in the front door, there would be a lazer field IN the door, so when they walk through it, they would be in pieces. Then if they got past that, they would see a big open area with a door WAY on the other side. When they walk forward a sensor would detect them, and the floor would fall to a pool full of blood and guts, from previous intruders. Then, the door behind him would close, then the ceiling would open, and holes would appear everywhere. Then fire would shoot from them. Incinerating anything in the vicinity of the room. Then the ceiling would just plain fall on the room. Then under its extreme weight, it would fall to the center of the earth.


One word.....DEAD

[likesallusions]

Unrealisticly...Have a floating fortress really high in the sky just low enough not to freeze or suffocate completely, the first room surrounds the fortress and is airtight, anyone who enters lets in air and changes the air pressure in the room so sensors go off and sets off the alarm. The whole fortress goes on alert and on guard, poison gas is immediately released and is very quickly getting sucked out toward whoever got the door opened because of the difference in pressure inside and outside, and if they don't die or fall then die and make it in, then they have to make it through a constantly changing labrynth that is kept always in really below freezing temperatures, the floor falls out if anything steps on it, they freeze to the walls if they touch them. They make it through there, several of my top most trusted warriors will be waiting to take them out. They win that I meet them with the rest of my top most trusted warriors and figure out how they made it through, and the room will be monitored so I can tell if they're lying, see if there's need to make a deal, try to, and if they refuse suddenly simply make the floor beneath them fall out. I'm not currently sure what I'll do if they survive that, too, but if they don't then I'll reset the fortress, fix and modify what needs to be fixed or modified, then go on to what we were previously doing. And of course anyone who died, except for the inruder, hold the funerals and then hire and train new warriors. I might clear up other stuff later.

[DarkDragoonX]

Napalm. Lots and lots of napalm.

[Skulkraken]

Flying ninja pirate monkeys. Armed with chainguns.

[likesallusions]

As a last resort, try and win over the Varden and elves in Du Weldenvarden. Maybe even Surda, the dwarves in the Beors and the other humans! Well, basically everyone in Alagaesia. Am I crazy? Probably.
What are we hiding in our fortresses that's so important? (The series of Eragon by Christopher Paolini, if you don't recognize names.):)