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View Full Version : Zomg This Is My New Religion!!!111



Beldaran
08-28-2005, 01:48 PM
ALL HAIL THE FYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER (http://www.venganza.org/)

I am a newly converted FSMist. All hail his noodly majesty. Who will join me in worshipping our spaghetti lord?

http://www.venganza.org/shirt100.jpg

Dechipher
08-28-2005, 01:50 PM
Ahahahahah.


Beware Christian Backlash.

Beldaran
08-28-2005, 01:52 PM
Beware Christian Backlash.

I'm sure they'll be as respectful of my religion as any other religion. Tolerance is key here folks.

In His holy noodle,

Beldaran

carrot red
08-28-2005, 02:29 PM
Touched by his noodly what?!? The only way I'm letting this thing touch me is with Alfredo sauce in my plate! That's how respectful I am of spaghetti with a title.

Darth Marsden
08-29-2005, 05:38 AM
I already have one Lord, or as he prefers to be known, Emperor. All other pretenders shall be struck down, and you shall come to know the power of the Dark Side. Join us, and we will crush the Rebel alliance... together!

theplustwo
08-29-2005, 06:31 AM
Dudes you're all supposed to be worshipping Glenn as the omniscient being of this, and all other universes.

Ich
08-29-2005, 09:19 AM
As awesome as his noodly holiness is, I'm a fan of Discordianism myself. I considered for a while registering (on official forms, in the census, etc.) Discordian, but haven't really bothered to do so. I will in the future. I have learned enough about the religion to quote "scripture," engage in theological debate, and act devoted when I'm accosted by strangers seeking to convert me to a different faith. I figure they're asking for it.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Discordianism

(What's also really cool is the Discordian calendar:

"The Discordian calendar has five seasons of 73 days each: Chaos, Discord, Confusion, Bureaucracy, and The Aftermath. The Discordian year is aligned with the Gregorian calendar and begins on January 1, thus Chaos 1, 3171 YOLD is January 1, 2005 Gregorian.

The Discordian week consists of five days: Sweetmorn, Boomtime, Pungenday, Prickle-Prickle, and Setting Orange. The days of the week are named after the five basic Discordian elements, Sweet, Boom, Pungent, Prickle, and Orange. There are 73 of these weeks per year.")

AtmaWeapon
08-29-2005, 10:23 AM
When the great ancient Cthulhu rises from R'lyeh he will make all bow to his chaotic might!

Cthulhu Fhtagn!

*side note* Way to work in a prejudiced opinion, Dechipher. Too bad we can take a joke and ruined your excellent social commentary on the mania of Christianity!

Glitch
08-29-2005, 10:29 AM
I was touched by his noodly appendage.


OMG this letter to the site is friggin hillarious.


Bobby,

I am so glad the word has gotten out, and just in time, too. I am in my second trimester, and I was worried that when I gave birth to our Noodly Savior I would be shunned to the edges of society for giving birth to a fully-grown midgit in pirate regalia.

Yes, I have conceived the spirit of our Divine Lord, and immaculately, I might add. He came upon me while I was eating alone at The Olive Garden one evening this past winter--I was having a delicious meatball lasagna, I remember--and suddenly my eyes were filled with light, and the restaurant around me fell away, and there was nothing but His noodly appendage encircling me, caressing me. I cried out in ecstasy, and then I heard His voice in my ear, whispering to me, "In nine months time you shall give birth to a fully-grown midgit in pirate regalia, and He shall save the world from sin and hate and false notions about evolution and Creation."

I heard singing, and tomato sauce rained from the sky, and I saw angel hair pasta flying about with little farfalle wings and playing harps. It was beautiful. "You shall name Him....Prego...." said the Flying Spaghetti Monster, "and He shall bring in a new era of love and a worldwide following of Pastafarians willing to shed marinara sauce for what they believe."

And His noodly appendage left my trembling, sated body, and the singing faded, and I was once again in The Olive Garden, awaiting the birth of our Savior, Prego, who will deliver us from evil. I paid the check and went home and prayed all night to the Flying Spaghetti Monster. So fear not, Bobby! If Kansas refuses to include our religion in their science curriculum--imagine, survival of the fittest, ha! it is survival of the noodliest, any devout Pastafarian knows that--Prego shall smite those heathens and burn Kansas for all eternity. Ramen!

-Rebecca

Rainman
08-29-2005, 10:43 AM
Cthulhu Fhtagn!


This is the true lord. May you all hope to be eaten first when he arises again!

Axel
08-29-2005, 03:11 PM
I know how to handle gods. *reaches for proton pack* Shit, I'm a gorilla/surgeon now. Not a ghostbuster.... Where the hell is Father Mulcahy?

ZomfgIts0rzlolo
08-29-2005, 05:28 PM
That made my day.

bigjoe
09-02-2005, 05:41 PM
I was about to be touched by his noodly appendage, but then I threatened to sue. So, instead, he touched me with his meat ball.

Needless to say, teaching kids unrealistic ideals is REALLY preparing them for the future....