View Full Version : Useless notices in instruction manual and such
GerrardCapashen
07-19-2004, 10:57 AM
This thread is all about laughing at instruction manual designers who wrote totally useless notices about their products. Or what about these useless warnings on the product itself. Have a look at these.
I saw on a lawnmower : WARNING : DO NOT USE INDOOR.
on a hair dryer : DO NOT USE UNDER THE SHOWER
Waiting for more ... :tongue:
A friend of mine read one on a condom wrapper the other day that said something like 'always put condom on before sex..'
AtmaWeapon
07-19-2004, 01:00 PM
On christmas lights:
"NOT FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE"
I've never been able to figure out exactly where they wanted me to use them.
GerrardCapashen
07-19-2004, 04:48 PM
maybe inside your walls ... that way you could tell everyone there are ghosts in your house cause of strange luminous things coming outta the wall
Ever hear of BilL Engvall? Well hes a hilarious comedian, recently made even more famous than he already was by teh blue collar comedy tour. He has a hilarious bit called "heres your sign" about instead of putting all these warnings on products, just put stupid signs on people, and shit liek that, id recommend everyone to chack his shit out.
ShadowTiger
07-19-2004, 09:18 PM
Ever hear of Bill Engvall? Well hes a hilarious comedian, recently made even more famous than he already was by teh blue collar comedy tour. He has a hilarious bit called "heres your sign" about instead of putting all these warnings on products, just put stupid signs on people, and shit liek that, id recommend everyone to chack his shit out.Oh yeah, I've heard of him. :kawaii: He's hilarious! :D :lol: My favorite example of that is seen in the case where this truck driver, probably Bill Engvall himself, (Who knows.) is driving his truck down a busy highway, and gets stuck under a bridge because the truck is too tall for it. After a while, a cop car came along, and asked if he got stuck. Bill said in a very sarcastic voice, "No, I was transporting a bridge... Here's your sign." ..
... :D
Pablo
07-21-2004, 02:33 PM
I don't see why video game publishers still put that "Take a break every hour" warning in the manuals when very few people do it. Waste of space, if you ask me :shrug:
ShadowTiger
07-21-2004, 04:00 PM
Indeed.. but they're just covering all the bases. :shrug: There are most probably at least a few individuals out there who may experience some form of shock from the graphics. You never know. :-/
I think AtmaWeapons example is the most profound. I doubt anyone can figure that one out. o_o
moocow
07-21-2004, 04:30 PM
Ever hear of BilL Engvall? Well hes a hilarious comedian, recently made even more famous than he already was by teh blue collar comedy tour. He has a hilarious bit called "heres your sign" about instead of putting all these warnings on products, just put stupid signs on people, and shit liek that, id recommend everyone to chack his shit out.
http://www.snopes.com/humor/jokes/heresign.htm
Blue Collar Comedy Tour = best. laugh. ever.
GerrardCapashen
07-21-2004, 10:18 PM
The bridge thing's got to be one of the funniest thing I've heard. The guy really knows how to show us how we, humans, cannot think before acting or talking.
Yoshiman
07-21-2004, 11:44 PM
On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning keep out of children.
(You may have to reread this one)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
Source (http://techsupt.winbatch.com/webcgi/webbatch.exe?techsupt/nffunsupt.web+Lists~of~a~Strange~Nature+Warning~La bels.txt)
GerrardCapashen
07-21-2004, 11:51 PM
On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning keep out of children.
(You may have to reread this one)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
Source (http://techsupt.winbatch.com/webcgi/webbatch.exe?techsupt/nffunsupt.web+Lists~of~a~Strange~Nature+Warning~La bels.txt)
Oh my gosh, it suits the subject so nicely
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
Maybe you should try these one next time AtmaWeapon.
On a Swedish chain saw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or !!!!!genitals!!!!!!.
How am I supposed to do that anyway :laughing:
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