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Prrkitty
02-26-2004, 12:12 AM
The day finally arrives. Forrest Gump dies and goes to Heaven. He walks up to the Pearly Gates and is met by St. Peter himself. The good saint says, "Well, Forrest, we're glad to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must let you know however, that the place is filling up fast, so we have been administering an entrance examination for everyone. The test is short and you have to pass before you can get into heaven. You need to answer these three questions:"

1.) What days of the week begin with the letter "T"?
2.) How many seconds are there in a year?
3.) What is God's first name?

Forrest says, "Well, the first one-that's an easy one. There are two of them: Today and Tomorrow."

The saint's eyes open wide in surprise, "Forrest, that's not what I was thinking, but...I'll give you credit for that answer. How about the second question?"

"Now, that one's harder," says Forrest, "but I'll guess the only answer can be twelve."

Astounded, St. Peter says, "Twelve? Twelve? Forrest, how could you come up with twelve seconds in a year?"

"Shucks, there's gotta be twelve," Forrest answers, "January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd, etc."

"Hold it", interrupts St. Peter. "I see where you're going with this, and I'll have to give you credit for that one, too. Let's go on to the
next and final question. Can you tell me God's first name?"

"Sure", Forrest replies, "it's Andy."

"Andy!" exclaims the exasperated and frustrated saint. "OK, I can understand how you came up with your answers to my first two questions, but just how in the world did you come up with the name of 'Andy' as the first name of God?"

"Shucks," Forrest replies, "that was the easiest one of all."

"ANDY WALKS WITH ME, ANDY TALKS WITH ME, ANDY TELLS ME I AM HIS OWN"

St. Peter opens the Pearly Gates and says, "Run, Forrest, run!"

ShadowTiger
02-26-2004, 01:58 PM
:rofl: ... they just get better and better, don't they. ;) Heh. This was a good one.

If anyone has the latest Reader's Digest, although they have an only 'moderately' funny Laughter section, one of the post-article sections includes the type of car Jesus would drive. I should bring that in to show people. ;)

Gerudo
02-26-2004, 03:02 PM
that was pretty funny :)

good one, pk.

Slider Zero
02-26-2004, 06:33 PM
Strange...not even a joke from Prr helped...it was damn funny, but I do not laugh...

man.....this is gonna burn itself into my mind....

(note: just read Orion's account of a disaster)