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View Full Version : The easy and FUN way to rid the world of terrorists



Ganonator
01-24-2003, 03:43 PM
I don't know if this is true, but if it was, DAMN

I believe that the General "Black Jack" Pershing found another way to demonstrate the "Twist in the Wind" idea. Every one who may see this, please pass this on. Very effective, even if the ACLU would not approve.
John J. Pershing: Born September 13th, 1860 near Laclede, MS.
Died July 15th, 1948 in Washington, D.C.
Education West Point.
1891 Professor of Military Science and Tactics University of Nebraska
1898 Serves in the Spanish-American War
1901 Promoted Captain
1906 Promoted Brigadier General
1909 Military Governor of Moro Province, Philippines
1916 Promoted Major General
1919 Promoted General of the Armies
1921 Appointed Chief of Staff
1924 Retired from active duty.

One important thing to note beforehand is that Muslims detest pork because they believe pigs are filthy animals. Some of them simply refuse to eat it, while others won't even touch pigs at all, nor any of their by-products. To them, eating or touching a pig, its meat, its blood, etc., is to be instantly barred from paradise (and those 72 virgins) and doomed to hell.

Just before World War I, there were a number of terrorist attacks on the United States forces in the Philippines by; you guessed it, Muslim extremists. So General Pershing captured 50 terrorists and had them tied to posts execution style. He then had his men bring in two pigs and slaughter them in front of the now horrified terrorists.

The soldiers then soaked their bullets in the pigs blood, and proceeded to execute 49 of the terrorists by firing squad. The soldiers then dug a big hole, dumped in the terrorist's bodies and covered them in pig blood, entrails, etc. They let the 50th terrorist go. And for the next forty-two years, there was not a single Muslim extremist attack anywhere in the world.

mike5000
01-24-2003, 04:12 PM
Whoa! where did you find this?

Ganonator
01-24-2003, 04:30 PM
I have a friend that goes to school in Southern California who always finds really good stories and e-mails them to my original little group. I just found this one particularily *special*.

zables
01-24-2003, 05:27 PM
Wow... thats just plain mean. but man that would work incredibly well......

*note to self* if i somehow get drafted in the upcomming war that could be happening with Iraq, soak all my ammunition in pigs blood and warn them.
i could see it now:

HEY! MUSLIM ARSEHOLESS IM GONNA SHOOT YOU WITH PIGS... *BANG!*
/me falls to the ground
/me up in heaven says "Well that Sucked."

Ich
01-24-2003, 05:32 PM
It might make them just madder and claim that America is evil and anti Muslim...Oh wait, it already is like that.

Yoshiman
01-24-2003, 05:33 PM
Invent a pig launcher! Do you guys know what a potato gun looks like? Well, make it bugger and launch a pig out of it!

Dracula
01-24-2003, 05:42 PM
...Let's set up a catapult in Afghanistan, and shoot pigs!!!

Terrorist Soldier- "Uh, Osama... The Americans are kicking our asses... I'd say we surrender"

Osama- "Yes... We'll surrender... when pigs fly... *evil laugh*"

*pig flies right into Osama's cave*

Osama- "...oh, the humanity..."

zables
01-24-2003, 05:48 PM
Originally posted by Dracula
...Let's set up a catapult in Afghanistan, and shoot pigs!!!

Terrorist Soldier- "Uh, Osama... The Americans are kicking our asses... I'd say we surrender"

Osama- "Yes... We'll surrender... when pigs fly... *evil laugh*"

*pig flies right into Osama's cave*

Osama- "...oh, the humanity..."


:lol: thats hilarious!

hey, that gives me a good idea for flash project... :D
Drac - Your a Genius!

Rijuhn
01-24-2003, 09:03 PM
LOL, I find that extremely amusing. Call me sick or demented or perverted if you want, but I think any true American will crack a smile when they read that. I think America need to have such ruthless tactics when dealing with terrorist these days. :)

The Desperado
01-25-2003, 01:17 AM
You know, you could just duct tape them onto some cruise missles. That way their blood and guts go everywhere.
Or we could just send Bin Laden some Oscar Meyer Franks via FedEx. Might cause him to kill himself.

satanman
01-26-2003, 09:58 AM
mr burns: I think I'll donate $1,000,000 to the local orphanage... When pigs fly! ha ha ha...
*pig flies past window*
smithers: will you be donating that money now sir?
mr burns: no, I'd still prefer not.

:p it's similar, but less relevant.

dress some pigs in army gear and send them to fight :p

AlexMax
01-26-2003, 02:10 PM
That is a really good idea.

Wish I would have thouoght of that.