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zables
01-19-2003, 05:13 AM
Heres something that i think u guys might getta kick outta


Rules Of The Air

1. Every takeoff is optional. Every landing is mandatory.
2. If you push the stick forward, the houses get bigger. If you pull the stick back, they get smaller. That is, unless you keep pulling the stick all the way back, then they get bigger again.
3. Flying isn't dangerous. Crashing is what's dangerous.
4. It's always better to be down here wishing you were up there than up there wishing you were down there.
5. The ONLY time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.
6. The propeller is just a big fan in front of the plane used to keep the pilot cool. When it stops, you can actually watch the pilot start sweating.
7. When in doubt, hold on to your altitude. No one has ever collided with the sky.
8. A 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away. A 'great' landing is one after which they can use the plane again.
9. Learn from the mistakes of others. You won't live long enough to make all of them yourself.
10. You know you've landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp.
11. The probability of survival is inversely proportional to the angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival, small probability of survival and vice versa.
12. Never let an aircraft take you somewhere your brain didn't get to five minutes earlier.
13. Stay out of clouds. The silver lining everyone keeps talking about might be another airplane going in the opposite direction. Reliable sources also report that mountains have been known to hide out in clouds.
14. Always try to keep the number of landings you make equal to the number of take offs you've made.
15. There are three simple rules for making a smooth landing. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.
16. You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.
17. Helicopters can't fly - they're just so ugly the earth repels them.
18. If all you can see out of the window is ground that's going round and round and all you can hear is commotion coming from the passenger compartment, things are not as they should be.
19. In the ongoing battle between objects made of aluminium going hundreds of miles per hour and the ground going zero miles per hour, the ground has yet to lose.
20. Good judgment comes from experience. Unfortunately, the experience usually comes from bad judgment.
21. It's always a good idea to keep the pointy end going forward as much as possible.
22. Keep looking around. There's always something you missed.
23. Remember, gravity is not just a good idea. It's the law. And it's not subject to repeal.
24. The three most useless things to a pilot are the altitude above you, the runway behind you, and a tenth of a second ago.

Dr. Mutagen
01-19-2003, 04:14 PM
LMAO!! :lmao: I especially liked #17.

Fatty Lumpkin
01-19-2003, 05:10 PM
19's good.

gdorf
01-19-2003, 05:23 PM
You start with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.

Heh, good stuff. ;)

BebyGoku
01-19-2003, 05:24 PM
HEHE those were pretty funny

MrCow
01-19-2003, 05:42 PM
not bad not bad most true yea yea my question is where did ya find em

Ich
01-19-2003, 09:50 PM
I think I saw 'em somewhere before once; they're still pretty funny.

Drunken Tiger
01-19-2003, 09:59 PM
LoL, i like the landing one!! :P

DarkDragon
01-19-2003, 10:25 PM
I like 6 and 10, although I too have seen these before.

AlexMax
01-19-2003, 11:22 PM
Please don't post jokes you got off of some lame ass website or email. At least link us to them.

Ganonator
01-20-2003, 01:32 AM
woah.. way to ruin the moment, Alexmax... :D

anyway, these were good.. thanks

zables
01-20-2003, 07:00 PM
Originally posted by AlexMax
Please don't post jokes you got off of some lame ass website or email. At least link us to them.

Whoa man, cool the jets, whats its matter? it gave these poeple a good laugh (hopefully), and this way they didnt have to go through all the stupid arse popups that the website i found them on was plagued with...

anywho, im glad u guys liked em'
i cant remember the site i got thems off's URL @ the moment though...
just do a search on google for rules of the air + Joke

Gerudo
01-21-2003, 05:25 AM
Originally posted by AlexMax
Please don't post jokes you got off of some lame ass website or email. At least link us to them. yea alex, last i remember, you didnt absolutely HAVE to post links to lame-ass jokes, because if you did, thats almost the same as ADVERTISING!!! and we DONT WANT ADVERTISING, do we? no...

and tell me, how would you link to an email? hmm? :)

besides, mos people are too lazy or cautious to click links...

just because you cant enjoy a good laugh like therest of us... ;)

Axel
01-21-2003, 08:58 AM
he is the one who copied the Physics of Anime. so he's not one to talk.

heh, good stuff.