I Stumbled Across my Pets Diary...

[Jemsee]

EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY
DAY 180
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 181
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
1:30 pm - ooooooo. bath. bummer.
4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!


EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

DAY 752 -

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another houseplant.

DAY 761 -

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.

DAY 765 -

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

DAY 768 -

I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

DAY 771 -

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer". More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

DAY 774 -

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be
an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

[goKi]

your pets would be pretty mad if they found out you were reading them pour out their feelings.... should give them their privacy.

[Drunken Tiger]

lol... Where did you find them???? The dogs one is the best!!!

:laughing:

[ctrl-alt-delete]

I am still laughing ten minutes later about the cat. The dog one is funny too, but cats probably really do feel that way.

[DarkPanther]

lol, so very very true.

Cats :king:, Dogs :drool: - says da panthah.

[satanman]

:lol:

I've said it before, and I'll say it again,
Dogs drool, cats urinate. :)

My cats don't feel that way, whenever they go out, they always come back.

[mrz84]

:kitty: :kawaii: !

[Moblin Master]

:kitty: :lol:
that is truly the way cats feel. i love my cats but they really do resent me. :cry: oh well its so true. did you just make that up or did you yoink it from a website?

[King Link]

That's hilarious. I think that is what my cat's think when we clean them with the dreaded shampoo.

[mike5000]

Looks like your dogs favorite word is OH BOY!!!

[Jemsee]

Originally posted by Moblin Master
:kitty: :lol:
that is truly the way cats feel. i love my cats but they really do resent me. :cry: oh well its so true. did you just make that up or did you yoink it from a website?

I didn't snag it.
But it's not mine either.
The only time I get any real insperation is during a full moon.:cyclops:

[theplustwo]

dogs are better than cheese

[Rainman]

Bah! My cats aren't resentful in the least.... except for the youngest one. I insist on torturing him often by forcing him to do acrobatics. I always do this with the youngest cat. It's just my thing.

[Fatty Lumpkin]

:kitty:
My cats were freed to the outdoors due to their power over my mom due to 'allergies':rolleyes:

One of my cats is pregnant. How long is their pregnancy period?

I havn't had too much luck with dogs. They're outdoor also, so they all have either died or ran away.:uhoh:

Ah, well. I'm not a dog person anyway

[Mak-X]

Heheh that cat one was good following the dog